Breaking: Walmart Scrapping Memorial Day Sale For Pre-Trump Trade War Fiasco Sale

William Southold, The Southold Report

In a move to counter mounting fears of rising prices predicted as a result of the impending trade war with China, Walmart has canned its entire Memorial Day ad campaign if favor of a more direct “Pre-Trump Trade War Fiasco Sale”.

Prices are expected to be slashed an additional 15% over planned Memorial Day reductions to match exactly the expected tariff increases placed on Chinese imports, jumping from 10% to 25%.

“This could be very bad”, company spokesperson Floyd Grude told our reporter. “Bad for us and bad for our customers. With prices going up, sales will drop. We want to bank as much cash now, while we still can. There will be layoffs and store closures if Trump’s trade war turns nuclear. Any supervisors left will have to go back to the sales floor. We could be done being the the world’s largest retailer of cheap stuff that breaks.”

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(Original photo from Walmart - Lippincott)