TIL Why my dimwit stormtroopers cannot hit a freaking thing with their blasters.

As you may know, there have recently been several enormous problems caused by the fact that my moronic underlings can't hit the broad side of a moisture containment facility. The Empire has looked into several causes of this including, poor helmet design, lack of training and general idiocy.

Only one of these morons has a chance to hit anything.

As it turns out, the cause of their horrendous aim is their stupid blasters. Apparently, due to the fact that the blasters are designed with the power cell jutting out of the left side of the blaster (for some unknown reason) the weapons can only be held left handed. If the morons attempted to hold them with their right hands, they would bump up against their armor... which just so happens to be utterly useless!

But the poor blaster design or useless armor isn't even close to the biggest problem. The largest issue is the fact that 90% of these twits are RIGHT HANDED!

So they are firing with the wrong freaking hand! Brilliant!

This twit can't even eat with his left hand let alone aim.

So who is to blame for this snafu? My idiot boss of course... just like every other mess that I eventually have to clean up.

Apparently some geniuses on your planet liked the design so much that they tried to copy it.

The Sterling L2A3 9mm SMG

E-11 Blaster Rifle... with a stupid power cell sticking out

If you'd like to see how I finally figured this out, please reference the following transmission.

http://www.anythingleft-handed.co.uk/stormtroopers-left-handed.html

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