So many suffering at their own hands all because they are unwilling to let go of their beliefs
Yeah, maybe, but how many also suffer because they do give up their own beliefs, desires and expectations and accept something they shouldn't? How many settle for 'love'?
I don't think love should mean you put up with something you wouldn't normally put up with, with something that harms you emotionally and hinders your emotional growth... A lot of people do, though. many accept relationships they are unhappy with because they feel guilty about leaving, they feel they must. But why? Why should you stay in something that brings you no happiness or enjoyment?
I've heard this 'you're hurt because of your own expectations' thing before and while I do agree with it, I also think it's impossible to not have expectations. It s a convenient excuse to pull out at the right time, but everyone has expectations. For example, in your post, the person urging the other to let go of expectations expects them to do so, and is unhappy since the other person isn't letting go. Same thing, if you ask me...
Anyway, interesting, though grim post.
they just pick up different beliefs though, don't they? Having a belief or taking on a new belief still has nothing to do with the truth of much.
I don't see romantic relationships as "true (truth) love" as they are always conditional in many ways.
Perhaps it is because of this that humans can't know true love?
Reflection of you. Maybe the person doing the urging is the self asking to investigate again, to understand better. To stop getting hurt.
I think it's impossible for any love, except for that of a parent, to be unconditional. We all have conditions and expectations from partners and friends. It's the way we work...So I guess it really depends on what you mean by true love, you know?
Maybe, but I guess only I can know that, or you know, whoever has the mistaken expectations.
But I believe it's up to each and every one of us to figure out what we want to do and fuck up accordingly. If I (the expectations person, not me as in me) secretly do want to change my expectations and beliefs and accept the other as they are, then either I figure it out or I don't. I hold on to those expectations and suffer accordingly.
Or maybe I don't want to change them, you know?
And yeah, I see how it can be the self asking, it happens. But the other person, the one who has changed...well, they're kinda expecting the same thing, aren't they? Why can't you accept who I am now?
It's a continuous blame game, you know? It's my fault for being stubborn or it's his fault for having changed and I think both have equally good reasons for blaming the other..