You close with a rainbow, a positive outlook emerges from somewhere within you - it's clearly there sir!
A radical approach is to move towards pain. This approach understands that resisting pain keeps it alive, but facing it - asking it to its face and without fear, "who are you and what do you wish from me" - this can cause it to express itself, and thus, potentially, have no further need to hang around.
A very wise man said "Pain is mandatory, but suffering (the resistance to pain) is optional".
Respect to your life experiences, may you find rest and peace.
An offering:
The good news is, I am doing something about it.