Lao Khao: The Thai spirit that will knock your socks off

Ever had Lao Khao? Ever heard of it? I would bet not because I had never heard of it before I lived here and now that I do live in Thailand I rarely touch the stuff. It is some really hardcore stuff in a bottle that tastes about as terrible as you would imagine from a $1 liter bottle of booze.

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You'll see this stuff hidden on a shelf in most 7-11's and even in greater quantities at mom and pop minimarts. It doesn't get used by the expat community very often but if you would like a mental image of what it is like just imagine one of the worst shots of any booze that you have ever had in your life and then imagine that it is much much worse tasting than that: This is Lao Khao.

The first time I encountered it on a table with some friends who were drinking beer I thought it was a misplaced bottle of paint thinner. After i tasted a shot of it, I still thought it was a misplaced bottle of paint thinner. It's really rough and according to friends of mine it is a favorite beverage of the really low working class who want to get absolutely smashed while spending as little money as possible. I'm not a classist and I don't think I am a better person than a laborer, but this is some vile stuff and it basically guarantees an intense hangover.

I was intrigued by the apparent popularity of this devilish drink and it turns out that prior to 1960, it was quite common for people to get poisoned by improper distillery equipment being used in the production of this stuff.

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There are certain street-side "bars" that you can go to that for 10 baht (around 30 cents) you can try a shot of it without getting involved in buying the entire bottle. If you are going to try it I would suggest that you go this route because for most people, this is enough to convince you to leave it to other people. I have only had it a handful of times in the years that I have spent living here and even then it was more on a dare than me actually wanting to drink it.

There are 12 distilleries in Thailand for this swill and there are some "premium" brands as well. All of them cost next to nothing so I have a hard time believing that there is really all that much difference as far as quality is concerned.

The name Lao Khao (เหล้าขาว) means "rice liquor" but I have been told that most of them don't actually contain rice because they found some other toxic chemical that produces the same buzz but at a fraction of the price.

I'd steer clear of it if I were you and thankfully I don't know anyone that keeps this around the house for special occasions. I have never seen anyone successful that drinks this stuff and there might be a very real reason for that :)