RE: The Visionaires - contest entry for "Tell A Story To Me - The Known Future"
I loved the word play. It is so rich I got trapped in it. I had to re-read the story several times to follow the narrative line.
I found myself distracted all the time, looking for alternative meanings of every word, thinking about jokes, and puns.
When I read Andorra I thought about some money laundering scandals here in Venezuela. No wonder Andorra does not mess up with anyone's business, they wish noone would even ask whether they do some research about the nouveau riches that send millions to their banks.
Neutrality only rhymes with morality
We can't expect morality in science either, since they do not even rhyme :)
Anyone the Visionaire bots identified as a rabble-rouser would mysteriously disappear or die of "natural" or "accidental" causes.
We need that device.
You never know, even if you know the future, what Big Things lurk in small packages.
Poisons do :)
Ohhh, man, this has to be the most frequent comment I get on my writing, particularly from my own offspring, who know me and my voice better than anyone else:
I had to re-read the story several times to follow the narrative line.
I found myself distracted all the time,...
This is not how I want to write--I hate movies that try to confuse the viewer, and I hate novels that are tricky and sneaky and hard to follow. (Maybe this is connected to Jung and The Shadow we fight?)
Thank you for reading and commenting!! I always love to hear from Henry in Venezuala. :)
Thank you, Carol. I enjoy your writing very much.