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RE: Mariel and her vision for the future

in #tellastorytome5 years ago

This is such a complex tale of love, commitment and betrayal. The approach you take has so much potential and you really make the most of it. I like how you build the world with the backstory of it’s creator, setting a much wider picture in so few sentences. The dynamic, and the characters you have here are emotionally relatable. The character of Sohel, the early feeling he has of almost regret, and the relevance that gains when we realise what he has done. He really does lose something precious, his attempt to control Mariel very much back fired, and yet in a way it feels as though all he wanted was to keep her in his life even if he went about it in the worst way possible. Sulma is presented with the same dilemma, arguably worse for her mother like attachment to Mariel, she takes it hard at first, but she lives the real emotion with Mariel, she may have thrown things around like a lunatic but emotionally she processed it. She is able to let Mariel go, her love is selfless, which is a stark contrast to Sohel. Sulma wants to keep her there, but not like that, and when she sees what Sohel has done to Mariel, it opens her eyes and she doesn’t want to be that. There is a wonderful element of caring for someone enough to let them go in this that just brings so much to the tale of Mariel finding her way back to her daughter. It ending with her being with her daughter, and having a vision of her own future, happier, feels right. She has been through so much, and it’s not to say life will be easy now, she has (as Sohel highlighted) left the abundance and prestige, but she gets to find her daughter, and that was what she wanted. Beautiful! <3

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Thank you very much for your comments, they fill me with happiness. Sorry I'm late, I don't have much access to the internet at the moment. Thank you

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