I really do love your posts. This review is perfect. As a fan of both Christie and Malkovich, as it sounds you are, this is something I wanted to see. Your review has made me never want to see it, and at the same time makes me want to see how bad it is for myself.

Lines like this put your reviews over the top! "The majority of Christie fans will most assuredly hate this production, but afficionados of The Human Centipede might be willing to give it a go."