What It Is Like To Be In a Long Distance Relationship

in #teardrop8 years ago

Does long distance relationship really work?

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We all know that having a lasting romantic relationship is not that easy. Just imagine the struggle when you have an intimate relationship with your partner who is geographically isolated from each other. 

 

I personally know what it’s like. I have been in a relationship with the father of my two daughters for 10 years and for almost 5 years we are not together geographically because his job requires him to be in a place far away from us. 

 

I could still remember the first time he told me that he will be assigned to work far from us. It was noon when I received a text message from him. He told me to go home as fast as I can because he will have to pack his things and he will leave early tomorrow morning. As soon as I arrived I saw his big bags filled with his things and his cabinet is almost empty. You know how it feels when you are crying from the inside like a baby but have to be a responsible partner on the outside. We had dinner and I was able to fake it but every time I was looking in his eyes I see the same sadness that I am feeling.  It was only 240 km away from us but still it’s hard when you know it would take some time before you will see each other or hold each other’s arms. He stayed there for more than a year but I have to admit it’s not that hard because I’m also busy with my work and my kids and i can call him anytime, and if I really want to be with him it’s just 1000 PHP away for me to go there. He also comes home once a month, to cut the story short we we’re able to survived LDR for the first time, it was just a piece of cake. LOL

  

Then for the second time that we have to deal with LDR it is harder because it’s 790 km away from us, which requires a plane ticket to be together. He was told that he can go home every other month and we had an agreement that he will be present for all special occasions. Sadly though because of his job he missed special events like birthdays but I know he tried and that’s all that matters. I remember when I was expecting him to be home for Christmas but he was not allowed to go home, we go on a paycheck to paycheck every month, that means we don’t have extra money for a vacation to be with him plus the fact that fares were soaring high during those time of the year but I was able to find a way, we travelled the distance just to be together. As the days goes by phone calls were getting lesser and lesser. Lies kept piling up. Doubts are stronger. I thought we won’t be able to make it. I was religiously praying every night and God answered my prayer he was finally sent home for us to be together again. His absence taught me to give more value to his presence.

Then for the third and the last time he got a 3,437km job away from us, this time it requires a visa to be together, which means there would be no way for us to be with him on special occasions. We could only be with him after 18 months. I could still feel the pain of him leaving but still I was able to keep a smile on my face and didn’t let him see tears from my eyes but as soon as I turned my back tears keeps running down my face but I have to suck it in because I have to be strong for our kids, I was able to gain my composure as we ride a cab on our way home, the driver was listening to an FM station with LeAnn Rimes singing “How Do I Live?” on the background, as I hear quiet sobbing from my kids.

It was the saddest! So we stopped in a store where I bought something for the kids so that I can bring smiles back to their lips. Night time was sad because we always pray at night as a family. First Sunday was sad too, because it’s our family day, we go to church and eat out.  We have to get used of him not being around. I have to act as a mom and a father to the kids, worst is that phone calls were really expensive, internet was really bad that the only communication that we had is only during his office hours, which mostly he's busy working. He became distant.



Little by little long distance relationship took its toll on me. Little by little I start craving for his touch, for his attention, for his affection, for his love. Little by little I lost the smile on my face, I lost confidence, I lost interests in the things that I loved to do. Little by little I started seeing myself drinking more and more, Little by little I spend more and more time in bed. Little by little I was sad, lonely and depress. Little by little he lost me, I lost him. We lost US.



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@dangerousangel
Thanks for your time! Tata!!
March 10, 2018
Post#7

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It is so difficult to even find the right person let alone keep them. Time together too much can lead to distress where you no longer feel like you have an expression of yourself. However, too many days apart makes the heart wander at some point wondering when. Life is short.. It may be romantic to wait for ever for someone, but to spend life alone waiting for them is wrong. I think there is a balance. If I had to leave for over a year I would want to make trips back to my love or have them come with me. Once more than 3-5 years passes by, time really changes things.. I mean think about how few of you even knew what Bitcoin was 5 years ago! Life goes on.. I'll leave you with this:

My Heart Will Go On (Titanic) Taylor Davis - Violin Cover

Awwwe! That's really nice.. thanks.. Life goes on indeed..

I thought there was more to the story. It ended abruptly. Well, LDR doesn't expire, people are. If you continue doing it, who will suffer? I'd say go to a saloon, have your nail polish, have your hair cut, dye it for achange, go to a gym pump your muscles, bring your kids to a park play with them. Let him be where he belongs for a while. The heck with too much emotion and you making it worst for you and your kids.

Sometimes when we touch the HONESTY'S TOO MUCH... wow, nice lyrics really. You have lovely kids. Your kids can't replace you but our lovers we can change them whenever we like if we choose to (of course with valid and callous reasons, though)...

The lyrics made me laugh, didnt expect that coming lol as of this time i really focus on myself and my kids. I'm planning to write about my journey to happiness. Hope you continue to check my articles! :)

Yes, I will check your articles...

Thank you! God bless!

I can only imagine how difficult it is. I imagine because I have never had a relationship in my life. Hahaha! No boyfriend since birth. Can you believe it?
Be grateful that you have that someone. Although he may be far away, he will come back and you will eventually see each other again. Or have you called it quits? Well, they say it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Be happy for your children as well. You have them to keep you company.
I only have my stuffed toys and pillow to keep me company when I am alone. But I am used to it, I enjoy my time with myself a lot.
Do not focus on the loss, but more on what you have right now. Take care always! Life is beautiful!

Called it quits my friend.. can't hardly believe that you dont have bf since birth but its evident in your smile that you're enjoying your life as single. Agree i got my kids and they are the reason for my sanity. God is good all the time!

This post has received a 0.35 % upvote from @drotto thanks to: @banjo.

Long distance relationships can work, but not forever...

Yup just like the saying goes, "nothing lasts forever". Thank you for reading my article. Hope you join me again next time :)

Long distance relationship is so difficult , you need to have TRUST. God bless sis.!!

Agree trust is essential in any relationship more so if it's long distance..

My prayers are always with you. 💗

Thank you so much marse!!! 💋

so sad @dangerousangel, I felt the feelings for you, because I know how it's painful when true love partner are not together. All the same you need to keep strong and stronger and never look back. Look into first feelings that you have for him keep growing in it. Your kids are cute.

Thanks soo much @princefm will keep that in mind. It's a tually a good thing that steemit was introduced to me at least i have a good way of expressing how i feel and hopefully earn from it right? Also i get to meet new friends like you.. ☺️

Welcome friend

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