Make Me Smile Contest: When You Give Them Space To Be....

Hi There 😊

So it's been awhile. I'm still basking in the aftermath of a great get together over CNY on Sunday. So what can follow that I wondered. And just like that, the Universe answered me by presenting me with @elizacheng's Make Me Smile challenge.

I am blessed and there are many, many things that make me smile but I didn't always have this state of mind. I had to make an effort and even went for workshops to change the way I processed situations. To be grateful, to know I am in control and the whole 9 yards. I have always known this... but knowing and practicing are two different things. Sure, I have moments where I lapse into my default "worry" state but now I can catch myself and get back on track.

So for the challenge, I would like to share a story of "allowance", not for me but my kids. I would say most of us live our dreams through our kids. All the things we couldn't do, we get the kids to do. Like my Mum, she had to sacrifice school and she feels that if she had the opportunity she would have become a doctor. And so for her, you say education and she'd do anything to help you out. She even did three jobs to support my brother's.

As for me, when I was a kid I wanted to be a ballerina or at least a dancer, I wanted to be an orator and play the piano. Oh, I had many, many dreams. However, we were too poor for all that jazz. So when my daughter came along, guess what? I pushed her to do gymrama.... but the teacher was from hell and it didn't last more than a month and the poor child was traumatised and refused to try another teacher. I sent her to acting classes to build her confidence because I thought she was too quiet around people. Later on, I sent her for piano.... yes you get the picture. My intentions were good, I was only looking out for her, wanting the best for her but they were all good things in my world. She obliged.

Then one day I realised, she was doing many of these things just to please me. Some she had grown to like, but none of them were really her choice. When I got busy taking care of my mum who was very sick, the kids had extra time on their hands because they had to fend for themselves every now and then. This is when my daughter discovered anime. Then she discovered her love for drawing/sketching. And for her last birthday she asked if she could have a digital pad which she paid half of with her savings. And when I saw what she could do, my heart swelled with pride. Who would have thought?

And this is one of the many things that have taught me to step back and "allow" them to be them. Here is one of her earlier sketches which I found lying on the kitchen table. It was smudged because the eraser on the back of the pencil had ink and she didn't know. So she was disheartened and went to bed before I got home. I however, fell in love with it, took a picture and saved it on my phone. Even she doesn't have a copy of this. Today I share if with you because it makes me smile that she has found something that's hers and not Mummy's.

She has her own account @artik but she got busy with school. But honestly, let me know if this is me just being a mother and thinking her child is talented like all mothers do or do you think she has something there..... and Thank You for dropping by