Well, ok then. This is the third or fourth time I've circled around to this post, and the first time I actually have black bits behind the cursor.

I'm not a past dweller-I typically want to know what's next. It's why I ride so long on my motorcycle. I want to see what's next.

I am, right today, embroiled in my past. No ducking, no dodging it's take off the gloves and get to it time. Money is involved (it's always about the money one way or another) but also the past as a foggy happy place. It isn't, it wasn't and now is the time to kick that ass to the curb. Hopefully once and for all.

I was 'forced' to state an answer last night that I have known for years and never fully acknowledged. There are parts of my life that I just don't ever want to revisit. Carrying them around with me is burden enough, I think.

I suspect my money difficulties right this minute are related. At some level I needed to get to this problem and lack of money has been the path.

For better or worse, I'm looking for what is next again.

Thank you for this. I look forward to it every Sunday-it always grabs at me whether I respond or not. I truly do appreciate it.