Scars

Mother's Day doubles as the day I left an abusive relationship after 8 years. It has now been 8 years since I left and I can't even begin to tell you how thankful I am for all the people who came alongside me and supported me through that process because let me tell you, it was ugly. I'm now standing with a friend as she leaves an unhealthy and controlling (although not violent) relationship and I'm brought back to that day....to that moment. When he told me "I'll kill you.", I believed him. In fact, I still do. I believe deep down that there is still a very solid possibility that my life will end at his hands and I haven't even had contact with him in years. That's the thing about relationships involving abuse, they are insidious. They get into the very fiber of your being. You learn to cope, I still sleep with my phone within arms reach although not in my hand like I used to, but it never really goes away. I will always be impacted by those experiences and I'd like to think that I'm stronger because of them. So to all the men, women, and children who've experienced violence at home and have survived, never forget that healing comes when you give yourself grace and time and deal with what you've gone through.