November 2000

Nov 1

I went to Yuki's in the afternoon. It's such a pity that she is just like everyone else! She already likes boys and thinks that to be natural. And of course she will end up marrying and having a lot of children. I means she wants to have a boyfriend already!

I was watching magic shows on TV again. Will record one thing I saw so I can remember it and retell everyone!
(So magician tells this story using playing cards..)

Someone had this dream. That he was at a cemetery and there were a lot of tombstones around. However they are all blank. That was that first night. After a few nights He had an identical dream. Except that this time one of the tomb stones had my name on. He got scared and pushed it to the ground and tried to wipe the name off. It did disappear. The next night, to his horror, the dream recurred. There was his name on one of the stones and his date of birth too. And current year. And the legend goes, that if you have a dream like that, you will die the next day. And this curse gets passed on to the person who hears this story... That is, if you have heard this story, you will have the dreams before your death too.

That's pretty cool. Of course I don't believe in it though. I love magic in general.

Nov 2

I have told you about this stupid Aoki at school who hits others and thinks it makes him cool. Although he is not well liked, everyone is afraid about telling so to him or to stand up for themselves. Recently I've heard that he kicked one of the girls so hard she hit the wall and no one told him off for it. What's wrong with everyone being so cowardly?! I always give him what he deserves if he tries to pick on me. I wonder when he will understand his stupidity? Human psychology is so interesting. To fear and respect idiots...

Keeping a journal is so important! I should write an essay about it. It does not only help to preserve a memory of important people and things. It helps you concentrate on the thoughts and really think about life etc. I think that if a person is to keep a journal for a decent period of time, he won't become a bad person. As he writes about his behaviour and analyses his thinking, he is bound to notice his mistakes and be motivated to make it right. In sum, there are a lot of benefits and one can only discover them for himself if he keeps a journal too.

Nov 3

This afternoon we went shopping. We finally went to the mall where I was hoping to buy a CD and a new diary book. And although mum said that "just grab it and we're leaving", she took way too much time walking around the clothing aisles and picking terrible things for me to try on. The things were so bad! If I had agreed to put them all on me, I would have become a copy of mum. Mum's taste is completely different from mine, old-fashioned and boring. And she likes different colours from me. When I had rejected her suggestions, she got upset. No matter what I'd say, even if I practically whisper, she'd go: "What are you yelling for!! If you dare yell at me like this again, I don't know what I'll do!" I would have liked to buy something nice for myself, but upon realising that there is no prospect of it, I gave up the idea and dragged myself behind mum hoping to go to the other floor soon. We ended up getting a jumper and a pair of trousers for me. I agreed to them just so that we could leave. I didn't like them much.

Nov 8

Today we had a work experience day at school. It is when you pick a place you'd like to work at out of the potentials and you get sent there. I went to a kindergarten. I really loved it. I used to think it's a hard job but turns out it's just fun. You really just have to play! At the end we had to show something to the children. Reading books or doing tricks or something like that. I showed them some tricks of course. They liked it. Overall, it was really good. I even thought that I may as well really become a child care worker. But I would prefer something more unusual. And then, when I grow up, maybe I won't enjoy playing as much anymore. You probably need to feel more equal and not look down on the children to enjoy playing . So I don't know.