My Night as a Cher Imitator
As I mentioned in my introduction, I love a dress up and I never lose a dress up.
Here's the event of one of my all-time bests.
Back in 2010, the missus and I were invited to one of my best mates 30th’s, back in my hometown of Warrnambool.
For those out of towners out there, Warrnambool's greatest exports are Dave Hughes (comedian), Jonno Brown (AFL Footballer) and Airbourne (Rock Band).
Anyway the theme was an 80's dress up and being that I spanned the ages of 2 - 12 in the 80's and with 3 older bro's, it was right up my alley.
I'd originally had the Cher dress up as an idea some years back and offered it to a workmate at the time, who did actually do it if I remember correctly, but I never saw it.
I have a rule of never doing the same dress up twice but as I only floated the idea then Cher was still available.
For some reason that escapes me I originally was going to go as Rick Astley, Inspector Gadget-type overcoat and all.
I had done all my local op-shops which is plenty in South Yarra and spent $40 or so in getting my rig together.
We left on the Friday and that was it...until morning.
At some point during night my decision seemed unwise to go as Rick Astley and to make a bigger impact something bigger was needed.
I got up early and headed to the Warrnambool op-shops to go Cher dress up looking.
To be honest I didn't need to find a hellava lot to wear but In needed to beat Jack McFarlen.
As we sat and watched St Kilda v Collingwood Grand Final 2 that year, Brooke made up my outfit and we with a bit of make up applied, we all set to go.
The priceless looks of the other party attendees, who I knew most of, let me know that my change of dress up was a success.
With plenty of skin and some horrendous black wig, there was no way I could lose this dress up.
At some point during the night of course If I Could Turn Back Time came on and I was called for an impromptu performance.
With more straddling then a rodeo, I made it through the entire song which is on video in the ether somewhere!
Here are some of my other best dress ups:
2015 Old Person Dress Up - dressed as a pensioner that looked far too much like my own mother, I ended up at the strippers at 3am on a Monday morning (my first time ever), and because I was "technically a woman" I was not allowed to take my change purse into the venue...what the?
2012 Back to School Dress Up - with a real light bulb idea and some excellent sewing work from the wife, I went as a half school girl/boy set up, with some shorts sewed to a shirt, cut in half and sewed to a dress with half a wig on as well 1 boy and girl school shoe on. For some reason I was "pickupable" that night by some chick in Brunswick. I was already married but how desperate to you need to be really?
Cricket Trips form Warrnambool to Melbourne - each year we'd hire a bus and after 2hrs sleep from a Saturday night outing we'd be on our way to Melbourne for the 6 or so hour trip there. Dress ups were optional but me and a few others would go op-a shopping a few days out to see what was around. At some point I had accumulated years worth of dress up material (I actually had a dress up box) and one year sported a dinosaur tail, a 70's Australian singlet, a WWF World Championship Belt, some umbrella that when opened turned into a cricket cap and various other tid-bits all in green and gold colors. If only there were mobile phones around in those days.
My last dress up was a few months ago with a very ordinary theme or 80's or 90's (lock in 1 of them come on) and I went as Hulk Hogan, tight spandex and all but I wasn't the best that day.
My mate Sauce (a red head) went as Ned Flanders at my suggestion after he shaved his beard off and left a very Flanders like mustache on, so I'll take half of that one.