RE: [Journal] A Monster Wants To Be A Girl // Healing From PTSD
I am a mix of good and bad, because I have had many good and bad experiences and I suppose I am as much a product of those experiences as anybody else. Being self-aware about that does not seem to empower me to self-purify, though.
I think psycho-analysis only goes so far in helping people with their mental health. Knowing what is wrong doesn't dispel what is wrong, that is only a portion of it. I get upset when people ask me to rehash old stories. Not because they hurt me so much anymore - they really don't - just that I find it useless past a certain point to pull apart the past. It is the present I'm interested in because that's what I live, and that's what's important.
I want to get rid of my demons because they hurt other people, and keep me from forming a lot of relationships because I am so terrified of letting those demons out. Maybe I can't get rid of them, but I can redirect their energy. Right now they have the ability to ruin my life and isolate me, and that's just unacceptable to me.