When Love Walks Out The Door And It's Your Fault
I remember standing there by the front door and watching her drive away, for the last time. The room that was already small seemed to be closing in on me already. It felt like I could stretch my arms out and touch every wall in the place.
There are worse things in the world than watching someone that you love walk out the door. It might not seem like it at the time, because in the immediate, your only thought is that you have lost that person and about how much it hurts. When you sit back and think about it more clearly as the pain and the emotion starts to subside, and the truth hits you in the face like a brick....the truth that YOU and you alone were the cause of her leaving, that is when things get real.
As bad as it is for someone to leave you, it is much worse to drive them away because of your own actions. Because of your own immaturity, jealousy, judgment, lack of ambition, lack of communication...whatever the reason might be. If someone leaves you because of their own failings, disloyalty, loose morals, or just plain lack of caring, that can be accepted. It hurts, but at the end of the day you can say...it wasn't me. When it IS you..you have no escape.
The only way to get over it is to improve yourself so that you never make those mistakes again. Never hurt another person that you love ever again, and love them the way that they deserve. That's not to say that you have to be perfect because that's not possible, but we can always do better.
I can keep my head up because I know that I am making progress. I can sense that I am becoming a better person in many different ways. Little by little, step by step, day by day. I can look into the mirror and know that I will never again drive someone that I love away because of my own failings.
And I will prove it.
I am Scott. I love writing poetry and song lyrics and one day I hope to turn my lyrics into music. Please upvote and follow. I always follow back. :)
Thanks to Pixabay for the images.
I appreciate that you shared that story! Definitely watching someone leave is painful, because we can still do something desperate to take them back. Once they leave is easier because there`s nothing to do: just dealing with frustration
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