The 7 Best Things About Dracula's Castle

scan0017 (65)in #story • 8 years ago (edited)

Less than 2 weeks ago, on the other side of the world, I experienced one of the best Haunted Houses EVER!

Are you a person who likes Hallowe'en?

Have you ever gone out on Hallowe'en to experience the fun of the haunted houses that spring up every October?

If you have, you are going to LOVE ❤️ this!

If you're not a haunted house fan, permit me to guide you through one of the best haunts in the world!

Experience this massive production from the safety of your bed, your office, your couch, or maybe, just maybe, you're reading this in your bathroom.

I'm not referring to reading this in the shower.

If you're scared REALLY easily, this is a good spot for you to read it. You might shit yourself.

Doubtful, but now you've got an excuse for why your bathroom break at work is taking so long.

On to the tour!

This first scary part of the tour: The reality that the machines are taking over.
In a few years, you might be paying this thing your entrance fee instead of this hottie with her darling Australian accent. And fangs.

Admission fee list and the warning not to bring in any children under ten years old.

Any parent who would bring their single-digit-aged child into a place that looks like this from the outside --

-- should have child services called on them.

That way the social worker can go to the family's house, and take away all the booze, pornography and illegal drugs that toddler has stashed in his bunk bed.

Off to the left, we have a clock!

Isn't that nice!
You're familiar with cuckoo clocks, but are you familiar with kitty clocks?

Try to imagine the sound that thing makes...
Go ahead - conjure up the most awful cat sound you can think of.
Got it?

Ok, now mangle that sound 🔊 and make it ten times more gross.

Like an alley cat that's been half strangled, yodeling, in hardcore heat getting its tail pulled while really, really bored.

Kinda like if you're married to a woman and she's screaming at you, for something that's not at all your fault, and she hasn't slept in 24 hours.

Basically a sound that scratches keys against the chalk board of your soul and it's projected at your face through a megaphone 📢

A beautiful sound, which set the stage perfectly for a jaunt through a haunted house. In February.
On the Gold Coast of Australia 🇦🇺

Life's fun 👻

The first hallway through the heavy steel door that kept out people who haven't paid.

Or is it to keep the deranged beasts that lurk these halls IN?

Rounding the corner, the Christmas 🎄 colored hallway did nothing to alleviate my sense of impending doom...

I ate Mexican for lunch and didn't ask how long the self-guided tour would take.

Check out the ceiling - yup!
It moves to crush you....

Rounding the corner the hallway came to an abrupt end! WTF?

Checked for hidden doors, if I should crawl through one of the cabinet-like hatches to the right or left, when I heard a sound behind me...

COOL!

That Dracula's a crafty one, that deal-with-the-Devil making handsome bastard.

This exhibit fascinated me.

Full motion robotics, imagine the two skeletal dames wrestling back and forth with what I assume is a parking meter.

Was there a hidden message here?

Did this exhibit demonstrate the struggle for money between individuals in our society that serves only to be a fight never to be won, that we will struggle for money 💰 even beyond the grave?

Was it a metaphor for women from a forgotten era battling over a phallic symbol possessing money, a WARNING to women that they can be self-empowered and not to waste their efforts on a man who won't serve as a provider?

Or could it be that these skeletons were confused; and thought that once victorious with their fought over prize, they could take it home, insert a coin, and it would vibrate at a furious clip?

I stared, pondering these scenarios as though I were regarding a Jackson Pollock at the Museum of Modern Art in New York...

How the heck did they know what I had for lunch?

No holds barred in this House of Horrors - The beach is literally a 2 minute walk away, and sharks are the real deal over here.

Not the kind, nurturing, I'll leave you alone unless you pull my fin Nurse Sharks 🦈

The scary, legit af Great Whites that will take you down while you're surfing 🏄 then come on land and steal your car keys.

They don't PLAY in Dracula's Castle - Watch Out!

What's next?

This next section was my favorite part of Dracula's compound.

Check out the ceiling, the tiles on the floor, EVERYTHING!

If I ever found myself living in a legitimate mansion, I'm putting this in one section of the basement.

Check it out:

It keeps GOING!

So amazingly well done 👏 😍

Bravo Dracula, tasteful and elegant.
I want that in my house.
First, I need a big house.

Moving on!

Awesome!

"Carnival of Freaks" first stop, a politician.
Do they know what's happening on our side of the pond?

That sign to the left says "Keep Out"

I didn't.

I swear, this place just keeps GOING!

Money well spent 🤗

Ah yes, the Morgue.

Dead things 👻 💀 ☠️

Dead giant spiders?!?

More Dead Things!

A very cool tunnel you had to crawl through:

I looked back...

No time to snap a pic as I crawled for my life!

This haunted house production was absolutely fantastic. About half an hour or so to walk through, excellent props and special effects, all around a very fun and interesting overall design.

Some of the features have been left out, to ensure you'll be surprised and delighted by what you'll find on your own!

If you're ever in Surfer's Paradise, on the Gold Coast of Australia an hour south of Brisbane, check it out. Top marks all around.

Now if there are any Steemians under ten years old who just read this post, think of these things: