The "could have been" ...

Knowing others is wisdom.
Knowing yourself is enlightenment.
Lao Tse

Source

One of our pending tasks in life is to heal our childhood. No matter how old you are: the boy or girl we were is still there, inside us. And we can bring to him the love, understanding and affection he did not have. This question is vital and deserves extensive study; It will be an important part of a very few are or have already done. Healing one's own childhood and helping others to do the same is the only real possibility of breaking those invisible transmission belts that carry pain and evil from generation to generation.

The father who commits incest without a doubt is a monster that appears as guilty before society: but those perverse impulses, how and where were born in it? What circumstances accompanied him to get to act so abominable?
Without reaching these criminal extremes, the life of a normal family is sometimes the big trap where our childhood is trapped. And I say cheating, because the lethal doses of negativity that our parents injected us without wanting it and without knowing it, and that in turn unconsciously we pass on to our children, are always accompanied and surrounded by love, of real love that, with few exceptions, it always exists between parents and children.

You can love a child a lot and do irreparable harm to him with a wrong education. And that son or daughter will choose his partner according to the model transmitted by his father or mother, and in turn, when he has children, he will transmit them unknowingly that ambiguous cocktail of affection and errors; and those children, when they grow up in turn, will do the same ... And so from generation to generation, like a long chain whose beginning we can never know.

It is necessary to break that vicious circle. Staying anchored in the past is the strategy that fear and guilt use to prevent the present from being lived.

There is a tendency in all of us to remain mentally immersed in what was and is not anymore. And the evocation of the past, together with the fearful projection towards the future, is a subtle but implacable rope that immobilizes us and binds us, so that fear can continue to reign.

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Reference:
-La suerte está en tí - Mary Sol Olba. Editorial EDAF

Translated with Google Translator

Previously published in my blog of Weku