STEEM WARS - TEAM AUSTRALIA ALERT BULLETIN - STEEMIT WHALES TAKE FLIGHT - LEAVING STEEM WARS DESTINED TO FAIL!
Steemit Whales from across the globe are seeking refuge from the up-coming STEEM WARS - the only problem is - they are taking ALL their STEEM with them!
The Team Australia War Council
The Team Australia War Council consisting of the full Executive Committee, met this morning simply to finalise the Austrian surrender conditions, which would then pave our path into to Germany for our initial assault on 1 July. However, the meeting ended in complete disarray.
The Whale Herd
Just days ago Team Australia's largest whale - @trafalgar reported a disturbing trend among the other whales. They were anxious. At least treading warily it might seem. They were concerned about the impact that Australia's upcoming invasion of the world might have on the flow of STEEM.
This morning we received confirmation from Team Australia Intel that a whale exodus has in fact begun.
Whales in mass have been passing Team Australia Check-points across the globe. Reports have them not only departing the coast and descending into the depths of the STEEMIT Oceans, but has them ascending into the STEEMIT heavens as well.
The Supply Chain
The result of exodus is devastating to our plans for 'Global Domination'. Without access to the Whale Steem during this international campaign to be fought on multiple fronts, our troops would be left without supplies, without resources. Team Australia members will be at the mercy of our enemies, with no cavalry, no back-up!
Only 6 days out from the greatest offensive the word as ever seen and we realised - we can't fund it!
The Ukrainian Scientist in Ecuador
In desperation this afternoon, we sought out the services of TEAM AUSTRALIA Foundation Member @elviento.
The Foreign Ambassador for both the Ukraine and Ecuador always struck me as a curious, yet interesting fellow. He would shares splendid tales of how he would track the great Steem Whales through the steemit oceans with his unsual 'Whale Sonar'.
It now appears that this 'Whale Sonar' is our final hope.
In an urgent meeting this afternoon, @elviento gave a demonstration on how the sonar worked and the latest enhancements meant the the great STEEM WHALES could now be tracked though the STEEMIT heavens, along with the oceans.
The Device
Using this state-of-the-art scientific Sonar Device we must now 'track and locate' the Steemit Whales and 'tag' them.
@elviento has agreed to allow exclusive use of the new Whale Sonar (version 1.0.3) for all TEAM AUSTRALIA members.
A full instruction briefing on the can be found in the following link. Please be sure to up-vote and resteem ensuring that the sonar is distributed to as many TEAM AUSTRALIA operatives as possible.
In return for his monumental contribution towards saving our war effort - the council unanimously agreed to offer @elviento the role of Team Australia's Executive Manager of Scientific Development.
@bearone would you be so kind as to prepare a new personalised footer for our new Executive please.
The Great Steem Whale Tagging
We are not there yet. Over the next 6 days we need to locate as many Whales as we can find and tag them.
Locating the STEEM WHALES is now possible with the Sonar Device. Then all we have to do now is 'tag' them.
To tag a whale effectively you simply need follow the following steps:
- Click on the target whale within the radar.
- Enter their most recent post and reply with the following:
"Stone the flamin crows that's a top bloody post [whale name]. Listen mate, if you're not too busy over the next few days hows about popping round to #teamaustralia and #steemwars to just say 'good-ay'. You could maybe join us for a beer or something - see how our war efforts are going. Bring the missus if yah wants. It's all cool man, hope to see yah soon [your name]."
Initial Council calculations conclude that this tagging approach will result in ample WHALE STEEM from curious whales to fund our STEEM WARS campaign.
Team Australia's official Whale Tracker.
However, I have one last task for one, maybe two suitable individuals - the Council doesn't want to stop at tagging whales - we want to profile them. An Executive Manager of Whale Tracking position will be offered to the individual who can successfully and succinctly profile three whales and post the report to #teamaustralia. Maybe see @choogirls member recruitment post to get an idea on how it might look.
Steem Wars
Assuming we all do our parts to attract the whales back - THE STEEM WARS ARE BACK ON!!
SirKnight
We offer a great refuge in times of unsettled oceanic political tensions. Australia's beaches are the finest for whales to throw themselves upon. We promise that you won't perish in our harsh sunlight.
Well put holoz0r - what whale wouldn't want to come to Oz? SK.
I once visited Australia. We bought a car in Cairns after scuba diving on the Great Barrier Reef. It was magnificent! The giant clams were breathtaking (which is good when your scuba diving), the corals were ancient, the fish were every size and shape and colour and innumerable. But i digress.
We drove clockwise around the continent: byron Bay, through surfers paradise, the whitsundays, Sydney, Melbourne, Adelaide, and on across the desert to Perth. I have glorious fond memories of spectacular people and places. But today that all ends...
It is war. Steemit war. Last man (or woman) blogging kind of war. The stakes are high. And despite the corny headers and footers and various relata, teamaustralia & team newzealand appear to be hiding behind a simple cut and paste strategy. Blokes (lol) this will not do.
We are Canada. We are awesome. We are enormous!!!
We will get you in sq. kilometres, we will get you in GDP, we will get you in best comedians, we will get you with our stronger dollar.
And if that doesn't do it, we will post pictures of canadian life that will make you weep with inadequacy and yearn for a Northern Hemi Address.
Capitulate! Lay down your arms. Be smart!
Canada 🇨🇦 is as Canada 🇨🇦 does!
@sirknight, thank you mate. You know how to write great articles.
Furthermore Whale's lab is improving core of Sonar now to track the migration routes of whales of all oceans. We will tag them all))
Here's literally my two cents 😉
Loving it @elviento - you getting much traffic on your site?
I have 4 different sites on this domain and statistic is common for all sites, so I can't see exactly whales sonar statistic
If you're accepting foreign spies, I have gained entrance into the secret, tangled Discord coven and can relay intel.
Although not completely proficient in my Australian language skills, thanks to @silverbug and his recent post about "yodas and chunder or something like that " I'm picking up more and more daily.
In Texas we have trained armadillos that can cross enemy lines, they also make fabulous fashion statements or helmets during combat.
All info you can gather is appreciated Blondie - thanks ;) SK
Great idea. I am now whale hunting!
How is the hunting going Scotty - nice CL post btw.
Cheers. Not sure if I got any but one upvoted the CL post. I'll try and hunt out a new 'success story' each week both whale and CL!
Voted up and RESTEEMED. Thanks sirknight for the brilliant article. Cheers.
Would you like to join us as a member of Team Australia @crowe?
I would. How do I go about doing it? Thanks.
You are already in, but I will make it official later tonight. Congratulations @crowe. Where are you from btw?
From Texas living and working currently in Ashkelon, Israel. Hope to go back to Texas soon. Thanks.
i am so confused by this lmao what??
Hi confuse myself sometimes to Tyler - how are you btw?
pretty good SirKnight...just trying to figure out what these whale wars are all about lol
I have no other way of putting this, but I'm new here...
Sorry for the massive emoji, I still can't figure out how to resize images
Is there something going on?
Look forward to hearing what this is about. All the best mate.
Hi Harry - yes mate Australia is going to war - check out @teamaustralia for the history of the team. SirKnight.
It's really a great article you've made. I really like this kind of story about Steemit. I will follow you because I love steemit and you are gifted in writing. Thank you
Thanks.
Had to stop and read!
Glad you did madlila. SK.