But no, I am not shutting down the blog. I already did make a hard reset a few months ago by taking down all my articles.

I am saying though, that I am done.

I am finished.

I am hereby getting rid of things I learnt and also speaking up against all values out there that are supposedly good for us.

I am rejecting my entire past, history and career so far, wherein I started blogging and writing six years ago.

The shocker that is realizing hard work, hustling and grinding don't actually work

They don't.

At least, not for all of us.

Successful people out there who are rich as fuck are always quick to say, or scream at your face that one needs to work hard and offer no excuses in order to get real results.

This means sleeping only 4 hours a day, working with assholes you don't even like and learning about shit you don't even care about. You must do it, otherwise you'll fail.

I did all of that before. I got out of my comfort zone and shit. I went against what I believed in, fucked it and did whatever I was told to do.

Did I attain some form of success? Hell yeah I did!

I clearly remember 2014 being a good year. I started making a decent, comfortable income every month.

But deep down I knew something wrong. Something didn't feel right.

All the internet marketing tactics, business values, hustling dogmas and marketing 101 I learnt never sat right with me. It never gelled well with the artist within me.

I hated promoting affiliate products which I knew was of subpar standard.

I hated promoting freebies to my readers which were shit I didn't believe in, mostly of the woo-woo, new-agey nature.

I hated forcing a virtual smile to network and get to know different assholes out there.

I hated taking in and following generic forms of inspiration and motivation from the internet.

When truly, you need to feel it every step of the way

Eventually, all the success I gained went away.

It wasn't even overnight loss. I didn't go bankrupt overnight or anything like that.

Things just naturally went missing as I subconsciously stopped doing things I learnt. It wasn't a huge declaration by me, "I have to do stop doing this because it doesn't align with my values!"

It was more of a subtle, "Ah. This again? I guess I should do it. But maybe later. Let me take a break."

That later stopped coming.

This is why I believe that one needs to feel it every step of the way in whatever it is you do if you want to truly succeed and feel that love you put in.

Otherwise, it's just going to go away eventually. It'll be subtle at first. And then one day, you realize it's all gone. You think to yourself, "Shit, where did it go?"

Question all you like, but it's all your doing.

Looking back, I stopped feeling it at every step for quite a while.

But yet, I just became more lost till today

I take full responsibility.

There's no one to blame but myself for the struggle I've dealt with. After all, I made the choices I made.

With a dip in income, the yearn for new directions in work and life, things couldn't have been harder.

Be true to yourself all you like, but reality always sets in. It's no joke going broke. It's tough to work without a sense of progress. It's dejecting to do it all alone without any support.

But of course, I always move forward.

Opposing forces again

Yet the cycle repeats.

I want success. I want a lot of things.

The culture today tells me then, again and again, "Hustle. Grind. No excuses. Work hard. Get out of comfort zones. Network. Take risks. Invest in yourself. Learn. Read. Go for seminars. Motivational YouTube videos. Whatever."

I try them again.

Learn a little. Gain some success.

Get tired.

Back to square one.

It's a tiring cycle.

And so I declare, I am done with this blog

Because I've come to believe that all the generic values out there in the cultures in every part of the world, despite having good intentions may not work for everyone.

At least, it didn't and doesn't for me.

It doesn't matter how 'good' something is. When it isn't the right time or moment for it, it will not work. Period. You won't drink more water when you're already underwater.

I wish I realized this fact that oozes with common sense earlier.

Truly, you can't take slapdash advice from some random, successful person out there. All they can do is give you blurbs fitted for a cocktail party.

If you want to succeed, then live your own way and work your own way. If you want take in inspiration from someone, find it when they were at their lowest and most honest.

This is the part I am called a whiner by some

Which is fine.

But know that I am confident enough to reply, "I don't care anymore."

"There is nothing wrong with me."

"There is a unique path waiting for me."

"You can walk your own. I'll not follow anymore."

And also, "You'll excuse me if I decide to want to befriend and connect with other like-minded folks who believe in me, trust my values and have faith in me. I am no longer interested in your generic values which has honestly turned you into an asshole who thinks all relationships should be transactional, in which you put a numerical value above all our heads, in which you think you're better than us. I am also extremely disgusted with your pretentious declarations of wanting to help others when in actual fact, they're nothing but facades used to lure people in to buy your bullshit products. Please also, for the love of everything truly good out there, STOP messaging me to act like a friend only to disappear halfway because you're too busy hustling or some shit."

Moving forward

I don't know where I am going.

But I feel liberated.

I just know I've stopped giving a fuck.

Every word I put down, every sentence I write and every story I create today, I do thinking, "I really don't give a fuck about money or how many people read this."

I am also looking to tap into social networks I actually enjoy using and also know that I can help and make a real impact. That personally, is the only form of marketing I want to start on now. I no longer wish to find out how to market myself by learning from some "how to market" asshole and then end up not enjoying the process.

Right now, I am more active on Steemit. You can find my profile over here.

Come on, come all. You're invited to share this journey with me.

But be prepared for something different.

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Posted from my blog with SteemPress : http://alden-tan.com/i-am-done/

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