Are your curves strong enough for my amazing sea legs?

Wind and words. We are only human, and the gods have fashioned us for love. That is our great glory, and our great tragedy.

To only the best women out there,

I'm a witty kinda man, who likes nothing more than fishing with the right woman, and socialising with my good mate, Jack Sparrow, who admires my daring qualities.

The first thing people usually notice about me is my brave personality, closly followed by my smashing sea legs. I can be a jerk when I don't know people well - with body parts like my sea legs and my teeth, I can afford to be.

I work as a pirate, helping myself. This allows me to exercise my skills: tieing knots and singing. One day, I was just about to stop work when Jack Sparrow appeared from nowhere and congratulated me on a job well done. "Pirate Captain, that was a job well done." That's the kind of thing people say to me on a daily basis. Of course, now, Jack Sparrow and me are best friends, and the praise runs like water. A lesser man would get a big head.

My life goals include:

• Fight a dragon
• Shoot a follow-up to the perfume advert I star in
• Become the best pirate I can be

If you're the right woman for me, you'll be smart and beautiful. You won't be afraid to swab my decks and will have a healthy respect for me.

My ideal date would involve sailing in Pirate's Island with a curvy woman by my side. While we're there, I evaluate your strong legs, checking that you're up to my understandably high standards.

Women only get one chance with me. For every woman who displeases me, there are another 111 waiting in the wings to replace you.

When you play The Game Of Love, you win or you die.

If you're worthy, get in touch!

by @rakkasan84

Thanks for reading a fun randomly generated dating profile for our friend the Pirate Captain.