Steemland Adventures - Episode 1, Fridays

in #steemland8 years ago


In a time called the present, far far out in the Pacific there lies an island, and on this distant island is a newly formed nation based on decentralization. Where the citizens call this land Steemit. A unique culture, rich in diversity resides here and no matter the issues,

It is always sunny in Steemland…

Up on capital hill, the president and his group of highly skilled advisors run the show. Attempting to keep the current citizens happy while pushing foriegn immigration policies to attract more citizens to this growing country.
“Mr. President… We have a problem!” exclaimed @klye, who was the current secretary of state but acted more as a receptionist to the president.
“Um… Mr. President… are you listening to me?”
The president just stood there peering out the windows and rubbing his head.
Finally Klye yelled, “HEY @ned!
“Yes! I fucken heard you!"
Ned replied harshly,

"What the fuck do you want Klye?”

“Well Mr. President, I just received word that an angry mob of citizens are making their way here. They seem really passed off and should be here at any minute!”
Ned grumbled and went back to rubbing his head,
“Klye, do you know what day it is?" Ned asked.
“Sir, it’s Friday.”
“Yes. That’s right! You will get a cookie. But that also means that yesterday was Thursday, and do you know what happens on Thursdays?”
“Um, no Mr. President. I’m clueless.” Klye responded
“Seriously? My secretary of state doesn’t know what Thursdays mean…”
Ned was shaking his head, then turned and started screaming at Klye,

“Hookers and Blow Thursdays! "

"Hookers and Blow... I am really strung out on Fridays! Jesus Christ, why do I have ‘You’ as my receptionist?”
“Sir, I am your secretary of state…”
Still rubbing his head Ned continues to scream,
“BULLSHIT! YOUR FIRED! Grab your shit and get your ass out of here!”
“Um… Sir?”

“FIRED! Get up, and get the fuck out!”

Slowly, Klye got up from his desk, and softly spoke,
“But sir, Ned, I live here, remember? I have my room in the closet and work 24hrs, I have no other place to go… I would become homeless”
Ned became irritated,

“Klye, look at me."

"Does it look like I care?"

As Klye began to exit the room, he gathered his belongings and had opened the door to leave when Ned called out to him,
“Hey Klye, I need you to do a favor for me… you know the gentlemen club down the road?”
Klye nodded
“Of course you do... Well I need you to go there and tell @alexanova that she is taking over your job. A promotion you see... Thank you Klye, now get out!”
Once Klye had left the office and the president was alone, the phone on Klye’s desk began to ring.
“What the hell? That is the most horrible noise I have ever heard! What the fuck is that!?”
After about what seemed forever, Ned grabbed the phone and threw it at the wall. And it stopped ringing.
“Thank god. I thought it would never end.”

Suddenly, the door flew open and in rushed Steemits top military advisor @anyx ,
“Mr. President! I regret to inform that a mob has gathered outside the building! They are being destructive and starting to riot!”
Ned walked to the window and peered down to the street with binoculars.

“Fuck! Why Is my car on fire!”

“Well sir, a few minutes ago, this mob towed your car into the street, poured gas on it and set it ablaze. They keep chanting your name, I believe they want you to speak to them… I believe they are being led by this one person, here take a look.”
Anyx pointed to the crowd and gave the binoculars to Ned.

“Mr President, that is @stellabelle. She has demanded you speak with her.”
Ned just shook his head,
“I’m not going down there. Your security, that’s your job! Who is your top officer?”
Anyx quickly replied,
“I have @cheetah, and he has his army of cheetah bots. Would you like to speak with him?”
Ned nodded and Anyx whistled. Within 2 seconds, a cheetah was in the office.

“Wow, he is fast! Tell this Cheetah to take care of the mob.”

This time, Anyx knelt down and spoke something incomprehensible to Cheetah, and the cheetah was running out of the office.

“I just don’t get it.” Ned began, “These people have got to be retarded! Burning my car… I mean, don’t they understand that I bought that with taxes that those same people payed? Don’t they realize I’m just going to get a new one, payed in full with more tax money?”
Ned shook his head, “Seriously, I didn’t even like the color. Pretty much did me a favor… now I’ll get the insurance settlement money and I will still use tax money to buy..."
Anyx was looking through the window when he interrupted Ned,

“Oh my god! The mob has ripped Cheetah's legs off! This is some serious shit Ned!

"I think you should probably go talk with them!”

Ned let out a long sigh and grunted,
“Fine, get me that Stellabelle up here asap! Figure out what her damn problem is...”
.
.
.

The End of episode 1



Disclaimer: All characters are fictional with any resemblances to real people being purely coincidence


@justiceforall

P.S. - I am terrible at Photoshop and could use some help

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Lol. This is such an awesome story for steemit! I can't help but laugh. Good setup, hope you keep going with it.

Why thank you sir. I thought nobody liked it. Surprised that it got a payout, last time I checked it had 2cents and 15votes!
I was going to continue whether it got a payout or not, but now I have some incentive... maybe I will put you in the next one?

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