RE: 'Losing It' - 100 Day Poetry Contest Day 57
Right after starting the read, I felt that it flows: at first the rhyming goes like "ity", the pace is slow thanks to the rhyming words, underlined by the line breaks (creativity, divinity, infinity) and then we start feeling a faster rhythm that is more tense in "thought, word, deed" that is keeping us in this condition of a speed up: it goes "black-back, fret-regret" gradually leading us to the feeling of "the right track".
Being honest, I'm not a fan of such words as "divinity, creativity" used in poetry, it appears somehow lame (unconvincing) to me, but they interestingly fit in the piece and moreover have some meaning, being far from divinity, from our Creator is painful, it's like leaving home.
I loved the way you managed to show WITH WORDS AND RHYMES!!! the process of slowly abandoning the course but steadily coming back on it. The imagery of "drifting away; slowly departing" are showing a journey to a whole new world of adventure (which is poetry), and the last line delivers the message of "being on the right track" even if there are moments of being exhausted and overwhelmed.
Thank you for your comment. I am glad you enjoyed the piece!
I find it peculiar that you would choose to label those words as 'lame' - as in truth they are just small tokens of recognition used to reference that which is beyond words - the infinite intelligence of this entire universe...
For me they carry some of the greatest implications and connotations of any words - for when we remember that we live in a Universe of ever-expanding creativity - that will expand throughout infinity - and we are all just an individuation of that same divinity - well then this whole world and life on earth will change over night.
My job here on Earth is to remind us all about this. To get us all back in touch with our divine creativity and possibilities - the potential we all hold within us to create any life we choose on this Earth -
The history does not have to equal the future. We can quite easily create something new here - We just need more and more people talking about it -
More and more people awakening our species.
So I remembered that's what I'm doing on this random-ass beautiful rock floating through space we call Mother Earth - I came to make it better in some way - that's why you'll find a large percentage of my writings are in some way infused with some sort of wisdom, or message, or reminder - about how we can create Unity and Harmony in this life.
Call me an optimist... I'd agree with you ;)
Thanks again for your openness and honesty. It always fascinates me how differently the same words are interpreted by everybody that reads them <3
With Love
Hart Floe Poet
♥
Ha, now I see that those words for you aren't just a few beautiful words that can be inserted in a poem for its better look. I felt it in the beginning, when said that they not only fit in the piece, but actually have a meaning there. I'm a genuine person, sometimes I may say things that aren't pleasant to hear, but I'm glad that you aprecciate honesty, Hart Floe.
I'm touched by your detailed answer and attention to my comment, you value your readers. You got me interested in your writing, I think I've never checked your other pieces.
Thank you once again for the write, I cherish the personal bond with poems that enter my soul.
Thank you so much... your response back means a lot. I can feel you are genuine because you totally shared with me your experience of the words... the value of that itself is beyond words... so thank you
I really do value my readers... and all people... because I know actually they are just reflections of myself :)
This was a really nice exchange :) I too cherish the bonds I'm forming in the community here, and I really hope you find other words that touch your soul in my other writings.
I also have videos of some of my performance pieces on my website :)
http://www.hartfloe.com
Thank you so much for coming here and interacting! Much love to you.
With Love
Hart Floe Poet
♥