RE: Why being political is a very personal thing - The story of the Russian-Germans from my family's point of view - Part two
Thank you, Kimberly. I see that you read it in depth, that means a lot to me.
Yes, so true. I always felt kind of unfitting when I talked about parents and our way of living towards the German children. My mom felt like a grandma to me and this gap between modernity and old times I was aware of. But then we children lived in this Russian German community and I think that was what gave us the biggest protection from being mocked or bullied. We were no minority and walked around with the confidence of those who can rely on many people. We were not particularly welcomed by the regular people but it helped a lot that we got compensation and that the government was not against but for us. That is a difference towards foreigners who come nowadays. They are not welcomed by the people nor the government, only endured.
I never watch the news but accidentally I saw a minister holding up a paper the other day (watching soccer with my brothers) which showed "masterplan migrants" on the front page. I was so disgusted. Immediately the thought popped into my mind "that is so American news style and the wording, too". Sorry, I don't want to say anything bad about your country, only the media. Our media sucks also (mostly):)
That is one of the reasons I am also blogging.
I bet you also could tell some good stories about your family history. Vietnam must have been horrible for your father. When I did research I read something about Vietnam and how actually the soldiers played a significant role. The image of this war was influenced by their behavior and that it became such a big failure in the eye of people was partly due to their disobedience and unfortunately also killings some of the higher ranked to weaken the popularity of the war. Have you talked to your father about his experiences and was he willing to open up a little? I can very well imagine how this effects the psychology of family members.
Immediately I am catching up the picture of your fathers father driving a Cadillac. Well, it's really interesting that you mention this differences between generations in wealth. Just the other day I was listening to a lecture wherein it was said that people automatically expect times to get better and better. But that is not true as your story tells.
Indeed the chip is not so much on my shoulder and that may be because I am the youngest and got lucky to not have had this hard experiences as my brothers and my sister. They all seem to be more burdened than I ever was. I got my share though, later on.
As the oldest of many siblings you are by nature in a very different position and I cannot even imagine to have so much responsibility towards all the young. Your position is for sure the thoughest of all. I am so proud of you (I hope I am allowed to say that) that you have this great ability to be in service in such a sensitive way. That is a gift, I repeat it.
... I see some similarities with my sister as she always was in charge of us. She was so giving all her life. But that is partly predetermined by family dynamics and partly chosen role - instead becoming bitter about it she could accept it. I am sometimes aggravated that she does not defend herself better when others want to accuse her. She becomes silent or sad.
The hardship of my family made me kind of immune towards complains. I don't like to waste my time on them as I am having a strong urge towards solutions. When I see something problematic I am quick to think about how to use resources. Especially after my systemic education I am almost incapable to not look at things from more than one side.
Yes, very much so, there is no one and only truth.
Looks like I am out of voting power, but my words are still here ;)
No need to worry about offending me in regards to American news/propaganda/Presidency as I know so much of it is awful.
Yes, I think, especially as far as the American Dream that many of us feel disgruntled over not being able to work hard and have the nice house with picket fence, two cars and boat for the weekends like many of our parents and grandparents had. Really, that dream (and anger of not experiencing the reality of that dream) is what his campaign was all about, "Let's make America great again." Still surprising to so many of us that he was elected, but I imagine many are angry (even if they don't say) and we were all socialized to believe we are the richest and best country and that anyone can have it all if only they pull themselves up by their bootstraps and work hard. With the lower standards of living it has become too easy to point to another group and blame it all on them for taking too much while taxes are skewed and those at the top grow wealthier and wealthier. I don't know what will happen?
Yes, I have talked a bit with my father, but it took years and he doesn't talk about the bad readily, more about how happy he was to see me and my mother (I was a couple of months old when he returned). He was drafted and already had a bachelors degree on his way to med school (never completed) and so he was placed as a radio repair man, running ahead of and behind troops to fix things. He didn't have to kill anyone, but saw more than he or anyone ought to and younger and uneducated soldiers did not receive him well. He'd been called up later and was 24, college educated from a middle-class home so when he arrived they drew straws, he said he knew they'd rigged it giving him the shortest one determining who would go furthest out in the jungle. He thought he'd be killed and so did he, but the Tet Offensive had just happened there and so where he ended up there was nothing/nobody left and he said in the end he believes that short straw is what saved his life.
Yes, I have always been in charge--first, of my siblings, and then of my own four children. I had my first baby just a month after turning seventeen! Then teaching other peoples kids at school!
I guess I do have much to write about and most of it often comes up in emotional form in my poetry and freewrites.
Well, my son is going to bed and I'd like to wish him sweet dreams, so I'll end for tonight.
Thanks for being proud of me :) Who doesn't like admiration? It's very nice to hear :)
Kimberly
No worries about voting. Let us skip it through the further conversation:)
Thank you for taking again your time with me.
Interesting, what you say about your dad. At least he talked a little about it. I hope that he over time got some support through therapy or self help groups.
Yes, your free writes are your personal method to work on what's important for you. I like it a lot.
There is a certain strange irony in the term "American dream," isn't there? After all, you can wake up from a dream at some point. Making it from dishwasher to millionaire is such a fairy tale and I wonder why it still gets so diligently dreamed. A Zen master would probably say that dishwashing is the essence of being. Which for me means something like treating my belongings with respect and having nothing but food and a roof over my head is something I can appreciate.
We don't know what's going to happen. It seems the best thing to do is to keep your heart free of hate and envy. There is no guarantee that the standard of living will remain the same or even improve. I'm not even sure if I can look at my life plan in such a way that things have improved or worsened for me. Too many factors play a role in this. ...
I want to be of service and to show other examples and give hope.
Yes, be of service and show examples of hope :)
Keep open and humble hearts and create the paradise by being and acting in LOVE.