How to help your teenager deal with puberty

It feels like just yesterday you were holding your innocent baby in your arms, dreaming of how they will grow up and what you will do and how you will handle every stage they go through.  

                                         

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One morning you wake up and it is like you have a new person - a very emosional new person - in your house.  And then it strikes you .....welcome to puberty.  

Your child is on his/her way to embark on this new road, and ready or not you will have to face it.

If you can still remember correctly, going through puberty is a roller coaster ride with many tears, doubts, insecurities and some shouting.  

                                                   

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How can you help your child embrace the changes and make the transition easier for everybody involved? (without any murders taking place hahaha)

Things you should know about puberty

• Puberty has its own time - it can happen as early as 8 years of age or in the late mid-teens.  It all depends on the child's rate of development.
• Puberty can bring insecurities - Children going through puberty can start feeling insecure.  Will people still like me?  Do they think I am awkward?  This lack of self-confidence can get worse if they start developing acne.
• Early bloomers face extra challenges - This is especially true with girls.  If they develop breasts and curves before their peers, they can be teased.
• Puberty does not mean maturity or being a grown up - A young person may look grown up, but that does not tell you anything about their ability to make decisions or be responsible.

What changes will take place in my body during puberty?

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How can you as a parent help during this stage?

• Talk to your child before puberty start - make sure you speak to your child that they can know what to expect if they start puberty.  Talk about the changes that will take place and also make sure they understand those feelings of "not fitting in" or "being different" are normal.  Make sure you have a positive attitude towards this all.
• Do not be evasive - if you talk to your child, be open and honest (even if it is difficult for you).  Give your child a chance to ask questions and answer it to the best of your ability.
• Ask your child questions that they will engage in conversation - ask or talk about other's experiences or your own of puberty and encourage your child to also take part in the conversation.
• Help your child to develop a sense of security  - make sure your child understands that you are there for them, if they feel happy or sad or confused or has any questions.
• Do not give up -  Do not be fooled by kids that do not want to take part in a conversation, they will still listen and take in and know that you are there.  Some kids just prefer not to have open conversations about topics that they feel embarrassed about.
• Encourage self-esteem - make sure your child understand that these changes do not have to affect how they feel about themself and will NEVER change your love for them.  Even thought there will be times they are not happy with the changes, all people go through it and it is important that they do not break themself down in their minds.
• Do not make silly jokes -  dads do not make silly jokes (especially towards your daughter) if you see her body is changing.  The child knows he/she is going through changes, they do not need to be reminded of it the whole time.

                     

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It can be demanding having a child in your house going through puberty, the one day you may get a smile and the next day you will get tears or a growl, but it is important to keep an open mind and make sure that your child knows that no matter what your love for them is unwavering and no matter how awkward they feel about their bodies, you are the one person who will not judge or joke about it and will be there for them no matter what feelings they have or mood swings they are going through.