How can I help my friend who is talking about suicide? - Tips for teens

Being a teenager is not always easy - for that matter being a human can be difficult and there is a lot of pressure and things that can go wrong in life.  

Sometimes people feel they have no purpose to live and they feel backed into a corner and do not know how to get out of it.  Sometimes people are depressed and they feel that it would be better if they end their own life.

What can you do if you know your friend is thinking about suicide?

                                   

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Some people think that if you are just talking about suicide, you will not go through with it, but that is not true.  That can be the first sign of a cry for help or showing you that the person feels he does not have a purpose to live any more.

Talking about death and that they feel it will be better than being alive, or not wanting to take part in any activities any more, even the ones they loved, having a change in their eating and sleeping patterns and taking part in things that can be destructive to them like drinking a lot or driving too fast or under the influence and generally not care if they can get hurt or not are all warning signs.

If you are a good friend, you would be able to pick up these changes in behavior and you can help your friend to get better.  Sometimes people who have suicidal ideas, just needs to be reminded that they are special and that you treasure them as a person.  They need to see that their life means something.

It can be very difficult to just ask a person straight out if they are having suicidal thoughts, but you can start off by asking in general how they feel about certain things, what is bothering them.  Do they have stress over a certain situation or how do they feel.

If you talk to someone and they feel that you are really interested, they will feel less alone and just knowing that someone cares, can help a lot.

If your friends starts opening up to you about their feelings, do not judge them or try and tell them how silly it is,  For them their feelings are major, so be a good listener.

Your friend will expect from you to keep what they have told a secret, but if you feel they are in danger, you need to get help.  Taking the responsibility on yourself to try and save your friend's life, can cause you a lot of stress and you are also young and not equipped to do so.  You need to get help from an adult or a professional.

At first your friend will be cross with your that you did not keep it a secret, but in time they will realize that you did it because you care.  

You need to help your friend, but you also need to take care of yourself and many teenagers are drawn into a deep dark hole themselves if they try and sort it out by themselves.  You do not need to feel ashamed if you can not handle it by yourself.  Many times the person is depressed and they need professional help - not only just talking to you.

It can happen that even after you have tried your best, or gotten help, that the person will still commit suicide.  This will make you feel very guilty and that you have failed him/her, but you need to understand that even if you tried, the final decision was still your friend's.

If a person does not succeed in committing suicide, it is important that you still will be there for them and show them that you want them to get better, but if it is draining your emotions and is making you feel worse about yourself, you will have to withdraw from the situation and leave it to an adult or professional to help.

At the end of the day we are each responsible for ourselves and even if we want to help others, we cannot loose ourselves in the process.

If you cannot deal with the death of a friend and it is making it more difficult to cope with your daily life, make sure you get help and talk about it, before you end up in the same position as your friend.

For more information you can read here.