Push Pull Flirting Method - Techniques, Examples, and Does it work? [Blog]

Push poll is one of the most stimulating flirting techniques out there but how effective is it our brains love contradiction. I mean even the opening line of this article was a contradiction posed as a question strangely enough many women are great at the push-pull technique without even trying but because many guys come off desperate or even needy it takes some practice to become even adequate at this technique so push-pull is defined as saying something nice and dovetailing it with something mean or saying something mean and then dovetailing it with something nice. So in this article I'm gonna teach you how to show interest which is also called the pole and then how to show this interest. Which is also called the push I'll also give you some examples and explain some expert opinions on the effectiveness of it many people think the push-pull technique is just a style of flirting where you can just memorize lines but to effectively attract a girl through interest and then this interest you must cater to the style of the girl that you were using it on which means you must do some research or already have a good foundation of attraction.

Push-pull is a very difficult skill but a very simple process which can make you lose the girl entirely, so we need think about using any one of these be sure. That it won't come off as if you're an idiot think of this style of flirting as hanging a toy in front of a cat if you hold the toy in front of the cat they won't go after it in fact if you lay it on the ground they won't even look at it twice but if you dangle it and pull it back right when they swat at it creating movement they'll go crazy and want the toy even more leave a like for my new kitten. So let's move on to ways to show interest or how to pull in a girl so you can do it physically you can obviously compliment her in a physical manner say something about her hair her smile the dress that she is wearing something about how she looks the catch to this is that it's very surface level but it's also very easy anyone can compliment someone based on their physical appearance the next thing you can pull in a girl is by talking about the characteristics that you have noticed. Maybe you already did your research and know that she likes to dance then ask her for a dance perhaps she's really good at mixing drinks or is amazing at decorating cakes so you got to know something about the characteristics of her to compliment her on those this is a deeper level than just physical but you should probably have met her once or twice a cool psychological trick is to mention something that you both like to do because we automatically like people who like the things.

That we like something I explained in full my previous article. Maybe she likes to ride horses say you grew up on a farm and you loved riding them too the third way to pull someone in is to mention that maybe you have seen her before or maybe have heard of her from a friend are you that girl that won first place in the marathon. Are you related to John Doe and maybe even my friend said you could paint better than anyone he's ever seen is this true basically you can pull someone in by relating to their world find a connection between you two and execute on it to go in for the approach and pull now there are some nonverbal ways to pull someone in. Obviously open body language there are nonverbal cues to pull a girl in keep your body language open which means you don't cross your arms make sure your feet stay pointed towards her and stay close in proximity basically give her the opportunity to approach you. Number two is eye contact eye contact is probably the most important nonverbal cue simply because one seven second glance is sometimes the most attractive thing you can literally do. There's a whole bunch of studies that prove this just look at her and smile if she looks back hold the eye contact for just a little bit longer than when you start to feel awkward and boom attraction will happen.

I explain why and I get more details in my course but just to keep it short just remember eye contact is super important and one more nonverbal pull is a lesser known cue is to simply look at the girl you're trying to flirt with. Make the come here motion with your hands this is literally pulling her in an alternative is to look at her and make a phone out of your hand like you're saying call me. So let's move on to disinterest you can show disinterest by pointing out something physical about the person you're talking to this is hard because you can offend someone super easily you know something like this I think you're cute but it's too bad that you're not my type high heels. I mean really I would avoid using these lines. But I'll give some examples in a little bit another way to push her away is to add a time restraint this is basically just limiting the time you are in conversation with her by saying that you have somewhere else to be say you're in a good conversation but you have to interrupt it. I told my friends I'd meet them five minutes ago. I have to leave or something like as fun as it is talking to you I really need to go switch my laundry by pulling away from her you were essentially pushing her away by committing to an alternative activity the third way to push someone away is called restricted request is basically asking her to do something by adding a clause or a string to the gesture. I'll give you my phone number but you have to promise not to text me right away or call me a whole bunch another example is do you want to go to a concert tomorrow you have to promise not to embarrass me though. I've heard that you can be pretty wild the idea is to ask for something but at a relevant joke or restriction to the asking that pushes her away. Also there's some ways to push someone away using nonverbal communication one simple way of pulling away is just to look away look at something else look over your shoulder like there's something else that you're interested in.

Maybe look outside or even at someone else and the second way is closed body language it's easy to push her away with just your body language point your toes away from her and towards the closest exit. If you're in a building cross your arms like you're upset and maybe even make the anger micro-expression if you missed my article on it make some space between the two of you and even grab something to create a barrier alright. So I'm gonna give you some examples one of them is that you can hug her and then after you hug her say okay that's enough while you physically like push her back a little bit another example is to say get away from me. I can't have you around you're way too cute and tempting see that one actually pushed first and then pulled the third one can actually be used as a pick-up line if I was into brunettes. I'd be all over you number four is I get the feeling you spend a lot of time in the library number five is something like if if she starts to cut you off or interrupt you all you have to do is say did you just cut me off I'm gonna have to teach you some manners and the last one is just telling someone that they blink a lot. I want to talk about why it might come off rude many girls will say that this method is rude and not authentic according to my own personal survey reddit comments and many other sources remember that if you do end up picking up a girl with this method she might have a tendency to need attention because girls who respond well to this type of flirting enjoy attention otherwise they wouldn't chase you when you push them away. Imagine if someone did the same to you you're in a business situation and the guy goes well we think we can pay you this year but we also need a new copy machine it happens all the time not that rude but it's actually really effective in negotiations but also how does it make you feel in the relationship what if a girl did this to you you're cute you look like my brother.

Well that's okay you might say but what if she said my brother also killed three women in his currently serving life in prison but you definitely have a smile see there's a line and if you cross it you can kiss your chance goodbye instead of kissing her in a study titled the ups and downs of dating researchers found that fluctuations of security in the early days of a new relationship was really really bad. Basically stated individuals who exhibited greater fluctuations in the repeated satisfaction ratings were more likely to be in relationships that eventually ended and also they had relatively lower commitment basically you may be able to get her using manipulation specifically using the withdraw of affection but you won't be able to keep them so I'd say long-term push-pull doesn't work it doesn't attract the people that you want to date and it also doesn't last very long. I'd say it's best to keep this style of flirting as a teasing method if you want to learn more about attracting girls and some pick up methods that are actually really helpful and lay a foundation of a great long-term relationship check out my psychology of Attraction course in the description. Hope you guys enjoy this article and learn something thanks for reading and follow me for more.