How I made $0.07 in 5 posts and how you can too!

Yes, that's right!  Ladies and Gentleman step right up and hear this amazing tale of how I was able to earn $0.07 in just 5 blog posts yesterday.  You may want to call your friends to gather around to hear this tale as well because with results like these everyone will copy this plan!!!

That's right.  First off, and most importantly I don't know any of the whales nor have any connection to them.  That's right, by living a whale free existence on here I'm basically ensured to never earn a cent by posting here.  You call them whales, I call them Steemit oligarchs, and without one of them deeming your content any good you'll likely never get a taste of being in the money!  Just like in the real world your opinion isn't worth shit unless someone with money supports it!  By embracing this concept soon you can live like me!

Now, once you've ruled out having a connection to the 0.1% of Steemit participants that control 90% of the Steem power and Steem dollars we're off to the minnows.  That's right, but don't worry, I have an absolute plan that will be sure to drive them all away!  That's right, I talk about uncomfortable subjects.  Despite evidence that as high as 25% of Americans consider themselves conspiracy theorists these subjects are still taboo!  By talking about them and having a system that publicly records who likes the posts people are nervous to approve the content for fear they will be socially ostracized for sharing unsanctioned opinions!

9/11, vaccines, occultism, and the Mandela Effect are sure to make sure that no one reads your posts and you are guaranteed fractions of a return on your time investment.  With this kind of money you can buy soap at Walmart when there are absurd specials going on or penny candies!

Yes, with this kind of money you too could have SEVEN count them SEVEN of the candies above, but WAIT!  THAT'S NOT ALL!!!

Yes, the final step of alienating just about everyone on the server is to complain about the policies of the server.  That's right, don't call them whales, that's too cute!  CALL THEM STEEMIT OLIGARCHS!  That way the 0.01% are sure never to read your content and if by chance they do, you'll be sure to piss them off enough never to upvote it.  Be sure to talk about how the execution on the white paper has led to an absurd case where 98% of the content is written by people that receive almost no reward.  You might even say it's a GIANT PONZI SCHEME!

You might think that's enough, but why stop there!  If you ACT NOW you can insult the people with power that might not like your critique.  Call them STEEMSTERS and make a douchy meme about them slandering your content and telling you to piss off back to Facebook-omalia!

With that final move completed you are virtually ensured to never earn above $0.07 on all your posts for a day!  Congratulations.  You have succeeded at free blogging and can live out your (impoverished) dreams!

You're welcome!