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RE: Showcase Sunday - Trust issues: learning to trust again

in #showcase-sunday5 years ago

I go the other direction and trust everyone. Only when they prove untrustworthy - rarely - do I stop trusting them and never forget it.

This comes from my 30 year accounting career that had a major focus on waste, fraud and abuse. The vast majority of problems came from people who were untrained or unknowledgeable to what they should have been doing. Very few people were actually out to rip off the company and they are easily caught if you know how to look.

On a personal level, I am a nomad, and usually in a place I have never been before with few resources and often not speaking the language. This has been my whole life story. Over and over again in all countries I have visited, trusting people has been my best plan. People come through and are more generous than you would ever believe if you trust they will be.

I was just today remembering a time I was lost at midnight in Northern Thailand. A guy on the bus managed to understand where I was trying to go and dragged me off a bus in the middle of nowhere. As soon as I got off the bus, I was wondering if I did the right thing. We were on the side of the road in the dark.

After a shaky half hour his whole family showed up in a van and drove me for miles and miles to the front gate where I needed to be. They refused my money and drove off into the night.

I could tell you 100 or 1000 stories like this one after 60 years of life. And I only had a couple where my best plan was to run.

This video is from a series on my yt channel for the topic. In it I say that evil in the world is too small to be relevant for my life, and so far, so good.

As for people on the internet, I have found a similar pattern. In over two years on STEEM, I have only seen a handful of people I do not trust. I assure you, I watch those few, and I am happy to see some of them got stabbed in our last fork.

Falling for scams, or thinking people owe you something are whole other topics. Live and learn :)

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I go the other direction and trust everyone.

People say this, I am yet to meet one who actually lives it. The judgement comes far too fast and the situations impact a lot. Those that "trust everyone" generally are either naive or have the experience to be able to judge the situation well enough. Again though, it isn't trust in them, it is you trusting your evaluation.

In over two years on STEEM, I have only seen a handful of people I do not trust.

You should look a little wider. :D

I handed my 2 week old baby over to a homeless guy on the street who wanted to hold him and that worked out well. The two ladies with me were ready to die, while he ended up crying with gratitude and good memories of his own son.

So sorry you have trouble with STEEMers. Maybe I am just lucky here, but I think not. I stand by my few evil-doers idea.

I don't feel naive, just content with how I see people.

Since I am 60 now, I don't know how much lack of experience has to do with my attitude. I feel like I have seen a lot in all this time.

If you are coming to STEEMFest, maybe we can connect there and then you can see for yourself. I would love to meet-up :)

I handed my 2 week old baby over to a homeless guy on the street who wanted to hold him and that worked out well.

And if he had been on bathsalts? Had hepatitis?

I don't feel naive, just content with how I see people.

THe "content with how you see people" is the thing. I didn't call you naive. You might have enough experience to judge the situation, many do not. I back myself and have travelled in some hairy situations too. I don't recommend it for everyone though.

So sorry you have trouble with STEEMers.

I have no trouble here, I just don't live in any kind of illusion of the kinds of people that are here.

Unfortunately, I won't make it to SteemFest this year though which is a pity, as I would love to catch up ith some of the people I met last year and meet the new. Have fun.

And if he had been on bathsalts? Had hepatitis?

I trusted he did not. I turned out to be right. Or if he had either of those troubles, they did not present themselves.

I feel lucky to have my accounting education and experience so I did learn how to judge people. But prior to that, I was a teenage runaway for years, and still found most people to be trustworthy and helpful.

What kind of people do you think are on STEEM? Different that the "real" world?

I hope I will have fun at STEEMFest and plan to. It will be my first, but I already know a number of people coming, so it will be reunion is some ways.

If something had happened to your son, would you blame yourself? What if it affected him for the rest of his life?

Lots of different types of people on Steem

My obesity, poor health, and many near death experiences during his childhood has caused my son's severe ptsd. If I regret anything, it is that I was not able to regain my health until he was in his late teens by which time, the damage I did not see coming was already done.

Since then, he has lost no less than 15 of his close childhood friends from our small rich beach town. They have been lost to suicides, car wrecks, drug overdoses, medical malpractice, and other horrifying and tragic means.

One thing he has thanked me for more than once is that I taught him not to be afraid of strangers. He is out on the streets now in San Diego at the ago of 26, (not on drugs or drinking). I know his ability to trust others regardless of what type they are helps him get through each difficult day.

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