RE: Is physical beauty more important?
In my case, my friend Kai is more charismatic, outgoing, and far more attractive than I am. Its not that I think of myself as inferior, I just know that I can't compete with a 6'4" physique bodybuilder when it comes to pure looks, and while I am more of an introvert he has a hugely egoic need to constantly be the center of attention.
What he has in outer game, however, I have in inner game and could easily match and counter his game (seriously, sometimes all it would take was the occasional poke prod as I sat back and watched him make an asshole out of himself) . Because of these differences we made a pretty great team when we weren't stepping on each others toes in the occasional 'out-alpha the alpha' competition.
That said, as successful as we were, I kind of preferred to fly solo or with a different friend group bc I found that as beautiful as the women we met were, I didnt really harmonize with the type of women that Kai would typically attract and vice-versa. Over time I realized that I didnt really desire the same things that he did and acted accordingly.
Now I can freely say that you are a wisdom machine. Every word you said I'll let it sink in, for the sake of changing the negative into the positive. You did things that even my parents and besties would not even be able to do, because they never seem to understand me. I know that thoughts and emotions are the nucleus of the beauty, but when you get distracted of what society thinks is beautiful, you forget to think rationally. That shit is tough, I have to be honest. I think I'll make an update in the following months, hopefully telling the news I always wanted to tell myself. As for now, I seriously have no idea how to thank you, if there is anything that I can do for you, please let me know. God bless you!
Thanks for the kind words, but not all that wisdom is my own its simply what I pieced together from the thoughts of other great minds... Our world is like a computer, with a multitude of programs built into it. I feel that its up to us to learn and teach the rules of the many different natural systems operating around us so that we can work with, not against, the universe, so no thanks is needed. There's alot to the process of self-love, and I'm more than happy to share what I know and encourage you in your journey. Nobody can do it for you, though... Like with Morpheus in The Matrix you are the one that had to take action, to walk through the door and face these strughles. Take these first few steps and maybe look into the law of attraction (The Secret is a great film about it), but know that they are only tools to use, as there is no single simple solution to the problems you experience. Please keep me updated, I'll do what I can to try to help and guide you, and please check out some of the thoughts and writings I'll be posting soon enough I think at least some of it will be a great help. Feel free to ask me anything and remember, its easy to get discouraged but there are many good souls around willing to help.