Why am I Kurt Cobain?

I grew up with Nirvana, I related to the music and he got into my head as a teen.

I was just watching his biography and observing through the words he spoke a blatant dislike of himself, so much so that it lead to him ending his life.

Luckily I have not experienced this level of dislike for myself to the point that I would want to end it all, but at moments I can relate to the thoughts that he was having.

Why did I say that he disliked himself, because he doesn't use these words directly in the movie, but he does make reference to not fitting in, having bad thoughts about himself and others. Nowadays he would be medicated to within an inch of his life and classed as a form of ADD, in fact even in the 70's he mentioned being given Ritalin, until he learnt to medicate himself through the use of cannabis. So his self abuse and his abuse of others much like myself was him not understanding his own dislike of himself, that stemmed from his make up in some way, it's been said that he had difficult astrology, and this I can also see if I study his chart, but it was accepted instead of being fully understood how this programming was playing out, and maybe the reason so many other so called successful celebs go under. Was it in the program?? That is also not to say that it should be accepted and allowed, it is highly possible to change, and stop the patterns and this I have walked and proven.

There are many points here that I can see from my early life where I can relate to Mr Cobain and his pain:

• I was a sensitive child like him
• I spent most of my childhood alone
• I was rebellious toward the system and my parents
• I loved my parents but felt guilt for not liking them very much at times
• I escaped through cannabis and wrapping myself up in music
• I judged myself harshly

So during those early years it is so important that children experience a calm and balanced family environment - and you would think that this was enough surely!? - but it's not, admittedly it has a bearing, infact childhood is where patterns are formed based on a few other factors as mentioned above, but on the whole there is a whole lot of suppression going on, and in Mr Cobain's case he expressed his experiences and didn't suppress them. But did I feel his pain in many ways growing up, yes I did, but I judged my experiences inside myself as bad and sought to suppress them, Kurt expressed himself through his art and music.

So there are two people with the same 'bad thoughts, feelings, emotions' one expressing and the other suppressing, but on the whole we all think the same way. Teenage can be confusing, emotions awakening and peer pressure to try new things, how we respond is different.

I worked/working out my programming, it's an ongoing process, but I have proven to myself that I can change the programming.

It is only now that in my forties that I found a process that literally walked me out of the darkness of my mind and allowed me to express myself, and I have little doubt if someone like Kurt Cobain found this process then quite possibly he would still be alive today ( based on my own experience of course) - This is not a pyramid sales pitch or a scam to take your money, it is simply one human being that has been there sharing what is the only thing that straightened them out and is still straightening her out.

That is the Desteni I Process - www.desteni.org. www.destonians.com

Promise you, you won't look back.