So in my travels thus far it has been a very interesting ride. There is very little taught about self care and how to actually do the things that are life skills in school and only since I got into a masters program was there any emphasis on these issues.
In working in mental health I have seen quite a number of very sad cases and have even been to some of those very dark places myself, but I would like to share some of this reallllly basic information that is surprisingly easy to talk about but exceedingly difficult to do.

Feelings and shit

These are some of my least favorite things as being male, the western society that I grew up in socializes me to not have them outside of rage and being horny. If you're interested in a further talk about this and hearing a super inspirational story check out Tony Porter's Ted Talk.

One of the keystones for my personal self care which is critical for me in my training of working towards being a mental health counselor is acknowledging the stuff that I really dont want to, like feelings positive or negative, sitting with rage and uncomfortable feelings and really digging into the sadness - not to wallow in it but to find the positives.

Really though, I am just some random guy on the internet and wont be able to convince you that I know any better than anyone else, so I am simply sharing my insights. I find it exceptionally helpful to think about it with this simple maxim:
Joy shared is joy doubled. Sadness shared is sadness halved

For me this rings especially true when I don't want to look at something. I may jump really deep into the internet or watch Netflix to infinity or even look to sex or other "worldly" comforts for my internal woes. 9 times out of 10 if I talk about what I am feeling I end up feeling better. Honestly, I am still baffled a ton by the way it works, and I can't tell you why it does. it simply works

Distress tolerance

So this is one of the things that I have only recently become acquainted with. At its core, its basically distracting yourself if you have significantly distressing emotions. I'm talking shit has hit the fan kind of feels. Ones that could lead you to self harm or worse. So these are quintessential human being skills.

Here's a short list that could be helpful:
Taking a nap
Not taking a nap
Watching TV
Playing Video Games
Going through my Steem posts and upvoting like a mad-person
going through your own Steem posts and upvoting
Doing anything on Steem
Talking to friends
Hanging out with friends
Drawing
Writing
Really any goddamn thing ever that distracts you from feeling like life is falling apart

This list is by no means exhaustive but as silly as it may seem these basic level things may seriously save lives. You may balk and chortle at this idea but what people don't know is that when shit is shitting the fan you can distract yourself and make it through one more hour/day/week. This is critical, as things always change. Emotions are like waves and with these skills you can help to let them pass. It really does work.

So without further adieu I will introduce the last thing that I really wish they had in school, which can literally be used on every problem (with some caveats).

Mindfulness

Oh great... here goes another idiot spouting about Buddha and shit, when I am feeling sad and want to die or so anxious I want to cut myself out of my skin with a fork

Challenge this line of thinking. I was in the same boat as you may be, dear friend, thinking that this was all new age mumbo-jumbo.
I stood very corrected though our friends in the research community as they are finding all sorts of awesome things out about how meditation can help with anxiety, depression, and generally all around bad feelings. This shit is wild. I mean really wild. This means that people have been doing this for thousands of years and we only recently found out how awesome this can be for people.

Also, you may not know what to do. I am a shining example that you do not have to be "good" at it. Its never good or bad really. You just are how you are. I have heard tons of fucked up shit and I still think this can be good for all of those people. So here is the down and dirty:

I can't sit in full lotus position?

Me either.

I can't close my eyes?

Then don't

I keep falling asleep

Take a nap friend. You probably need some sleep.

Dont know where to start?

The best answer is google! Just go check it out! There are tons of spodorman memes guided meditations that can really be a great starting place! They wont even require you to watch the whole video.

How do you do it?

There are tons of ways, but the most essential way that I like is set aside 30 seconds at first and just be in the world. By focusing on the breath and just trying to gently return attention to the breath if your mind wanders you are on your way to a meditation practice of your own!

I can't do it! Its too hard!

Yes. Yes, it is. And so is life. This is a pretty dope coping skill to have on your tool belt. But a hammer is only ever as good as the amount of uses it gets.

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So with these three things they can be coupled together like the Power Rangers into a pretty dope killin' robot that will make you awesome as hell and able to handle more shit.

So when the life train comes into station, metaphorically stare that bitch down and look it right in the headlamps and say:

And that really is the long and short of it to start.

This is meant to be a short and sweet run down of some skills that I really wish I had learned in high school (or even before).
It honestly is pretty sad to me that I only recently have learned these. This blog is not meant to diagnose treat or deal with shit. I am just another dude, with some training on some things. Use your head and accept what pertains to you and walk away from the rest.
Follow along and upvote for more awful updates on the state of the world, self-care strategies, crypto ideas news and experiences from my all around crazy ass ride within this life!
Your upvotes keep this college kid from starving. And for that, I thank you.