Scoliosis: Inferiority Complex

How do you define "inferiority" or "inferiority complex"?

According to https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/inferiority, inferiority is the condition of being lower in status or quality than another or others. And from https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inferiority_complex, an inferiority complex is the lack of self-worth, a doubt and uncertainty about oneself, and feelings of not measuring up to standards. It is often subconscious, and is thought to drive afflicted individuals to overcompensate, resulting either in spectacular achievement or extremely asocial behavior. In modern literature, the preferred terminology is "lack of covert self-esteem". For many, it is developed through a combination of genetic personality characteristics and personal experiences.

Growing up with a progressing hump on your back that everybody notices adds up to my timidity that in no time becomes inferiority. So, when talking about low self-esteem, it is a big "ME", a.k.a Edlyn Leigh.

I always thought of my self as less than the others. Just like anybody, I like to be appreciated but I prefer more to be unnoticed. Sometimes, I become shy when being acknowledged 'cause I don't think I'm good enough. I don't like attention and easily gets intimidated. I'm afraid of making mistakes and getting embarrassed. Well, who wants to be noticed negatively anyway? Of course, nobody. So everything else, I just kept to my self.

My puberty years, well, just a small circle of friends, school, church then home. That is how my life revolve. They say I'm a good student. Not because I excel but maybe because I'm a "home-school, school-home" kind of student. (You know what I mean.) Very rare occassion that I'll go elsewhere after school or during school hours. No powder nor make-up. ('Cause I don't think I deserve to be pretty. Hehe... ) I don't do stuffs like other girls. Not even a comb in my bag to fix my hair. I remember one time when @ryl fixed my hair and had it ponytailed while waiting for our class teacher. I was too shy to even raise my head up. I just kept my face on the table 😁. Not like @ryl who has a very strong personality, I must say I'm the opposite. But I can be talkative at times 😊.

Everything was good and fine during highschool. Maybe because people around me got used to what I look like but still couldn't avoid strange stares from people. I just pretend I don't notice and also got used to people's reactions when they see me ☺.

Here's a simple poem I made.

Self-confidence, I got none,
Had no guts to even have fun;
To be acknowledged, I don't think I deserve one,
That's how I thought because I'm less than anyone.

That's all for now ☺

I hope you enjoy reading about my life. Please follow me >> @blessedlynleigh and feel free to comment below 👇👇👇
And if you are interested to read my first article about my scolio, @Scoliosis: My Childhood

Thank you and God bless...

"... The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”
1 Samuel 16:7 (NIV)