Very interesting. I've often thought along similar lines. One thing I've encountered as a "smart woman" is that I have had a tendency to attract men who aren't very ambitious. I mean they want nice things, but they are attracted to women who seem smart enough to provide those things for them by the woman using her intellect and corporate abilities.

Now I actually tend to be attracted to men who are very in touch with their emotions, the Earth, and their intuition, which one might aptly call "feminine" qualities, but when I was younger that was in combination with drive, goals, and focused intentions (masculine qualities). That's because I was in the ambitious phase of life myself, and wanting someone who would contribute financially at least as much as I was trying to. But as I get older, I become more interested in someone who knows how to savor the sweetness of life, which is always found in the now, not future oriented seeking.

The question is, what balance of masculine and feminine works for any two people? No one is all one or the other, so necessarily there are different mixes of which traits a person takes from the yin or yang side of the spectrum.

You're right that these roles are shifting, and with that shift there is a lot of room for confusion because there aren't just 2 possibilities. There are infinite combinations of how the different aspects of masculine and feminine can interplay within an individual, and be drawn out within relationship to another person with their own mix of qualities. We aren't the same person with everyone! We change in relationship to who someone else is being with us. We grow with people. I'm sure people found it all so much simpler when all females were expected to cultivate only this set of traits and suppress all others, and males the reverse expectations.