Tales From a "Schizophrenic" Mind - Chapter One - What is Schizophrenia?
Chapter One - What is Schizophrenia?
As defined by Webster's New World Dictionary, schizophrenia is a mental disorder characterized by separation between thought and emotions, by delusions, bizarre behavior, etc.. As I have been at the receiving end of this particular label we call schizophrenia – including bi-polar – I will attempt to relate my experiences with living with this “disease.” In my explanation of separation between “rational” thought and emotions, I will say that to the person experiencing the “delusions” – that are often all too real – that their thought and emotional reactions are quite rational, just not easily understood by outside observers. Also since “thought” is contained within the mind, and when the “delusions” take on a life of their own, hence keeping the mind too busy to deal with “reality” that a state of “catatonia” results, it is not easily understood by the outside observer who cannot know what is going on in the mind of the “patient.” A long time ago we used to call people exhibiting these symptoms, “nuts”, but since that time we have invented all types of fancy new words to describe different types of “mental illness”, or any behavior that does not follow the accepted social norms.
From my understanding, back in the days of the Greek and Roman empires, “insanity” was looked upon as an infliction of the “spirit” by otherworldly causes, and based on my research and experiences, I very much agree with this outlook. After all, the term "psychiatry" literally means the 'medical treatment of the soul' (psych- "soul"; -iatry "medical treatment"). We appear to be frightened of this scenario today, and if not dismissed outright by doctors, it is minimally talked about with the patient during “note taking” along with purported “symptoms.” I have even had doctors suggest that discussing the patients' experiences makes them worse. I ask, what type of health practitioners are they if they are afraid to even talk about what the patient is going through?!? Gone are the days where it would be commonly suggested that a “troubled soul” seek a blessing from the local priest (and yes it works, albeit sometimes temporarily). Though I myself, shortly after my first “episode” received a hands-on-blessing and baptism (the full “dunk”) at the local Latter Day Saints Church, but that was of, and by my own volition in an effort to understand what I had gone through.
Prior times were simpler, where the “nuts” were to be avoided, and/or just given a hug and sent on their way. We now attempt to prescribe mood altering “medicine” and/or incarcerate those people in “psych wards” in a vain attempt to get them to act within well defined social thought patterns. Though the barbaric days of the “insane asylum” are gone, we still tend to treat the symptoms, and not the cause, for which I will make some suggestions near the end of this chapter. Even some of my fellow church members are reluctant to talk about the “spirits”, and anything mentioned about a “spiritual experience” that is not contained in one of their 2,000 year old holy books, you are automatically deemed as having, “been deceived”, for they can be a “stiff-necked” group of people at times. I eventually came across another church member who “saw spirits” (angels in this case) and said to me she is afraid to say anything about her experiences to other church members because she would be thought of as “crazy.” I later found out (though my own experiences) that this person sees angels because she actually is one (living her physical life on Earth), and one of the highest forms from what I am told (a Nephilim).
I would suggest that we have lost a lot of very creative people by continuing in this fashion for a century or so. A notable person on social media defines our generation as the “personality ethic”, whereas a hundred years ago we operated under the “character ethic” (IE the boyscout's honour). I believe we have lost much as a society in doing this, and much of the blame can be placed on the growth of the psychological field and “mental health” in general. The growth of mass media over the last century – such as radio, television, and movies – has played a large role in defining the accepted social norms we live by. To the casual observer it would seem nothing is amiss, but there have been many investigative journalists over the years who have delved into the question of what makes our society “tick” and quite often they come to some nefarious groups of people running things behind the scenes. Here I will provide a quote by David Rockefeller as food for thought, "Some even believe we (the Rockefeller family) are part of a secret cabal working against the best interests of the USA characterizing my family and me as 'internationalists' and of conspiring with others around the world to build a more integrated global political and economic structure - one world, if you will. If that's the charge, I stand guilty, and I am proud of it." Also, a relevant quote by Henry Ford, "It is well that the people of the nation do not understand our banking and monetary system, for if they did, I believe there would be a revolution before tomorrow morning." And finally, the infamous quote by a father of the modern banking system, Mayer Amschel Rothschild, "Permit me to issue and control the money of a nation, and I care not who makes its laws." For further information along this line I will refer the reader to a very well done book that compresses some 400,000 years of history into a very readable paperback book, “The Gods of Eden”, by William Bramley. I am told by my spirit guides (and another notable Internet personality, Alex Collier) that this book is approximately 85% historically accurate, which I consider a very impressive feat by the author. One more relevant quote, "One of the great stated discoveries in Scientology was the "Third Party Law". It stated that for two sides to continue to have a conflict, there HAS to be a HIDDEN THIRD PARTY who is invisible or not obvious, who is actually causing it all. That was the core subject of my letter." ~ Dane Tops
Before I had the term schizophrenia applied to me I was first “diagnosed” as bi-polar. My understanding of bi-polar is it describes someone as alternating between excessively happy and depressed moods, though I tended to be the latter. I think the doctor's at the time did not know what was “wrong” with me so the “bi-polar” label seemed the best fit. The more interesting thing – I think – is my “spiritual experiences” of what bi-polar disorder actually is. It appears to happen when a person has a personality(or spirit) split into two competing entities. At the spiritual level this often is the choice between a light verses darkness attitude. It could also be considered a choice between good and evil (or darkness) on the part of their spirit, and due to “irreconcilable differences” – or stress if you will – a split at the spiritual level happens. This will apparently most often happen during a spiritually “traumatic event” so the physical cause – if there is one – will not be easily understood. My understanding of this function of splitting is so that the spirit of the person can “heal” from the traumatic event, while giving them some “time to deal.” So in conclusion the “mood” of the bi-polar patient largely depends on the spirit/personality that is operating in the physical life at the time.
As an example of what I go through in dealing with the “spirits” from day to day, I posted this on a popular social website recently:
Yesterday (very early morning) i woke up (a "waking dream" i call them) to find myself on a hostile spaceship (this is spiritually, not physically) and subsequently (since i have had too many "spiritual deaths") I am apparently what is known as a "Ghost In The Shell” :( Although i am still human, and very much alive in the physical plane, my spirit is no longer what it was, but now a "ghost." I am not happy to be "told" this but based on my "experiences" over the last 10 years or so I am not surprised :(( I am told this is not easy to deal with if i was ever to "pass on my mortal coil" though I am told it is possible. ...peace out & God Bless :|
As mentioned earlier in this chapter I will now suggest some ways to deal with the so-called schizophrenic condition. To myself, having been at the receiving end of this “affliction”, someone exhibiting schizophrenic behavior screams loudly that they are either spiritually/physically possessed or at the least spiritually “beset” by evil spirits. I will say here that evil can show itself through an evil doing spirit (such as a physical life on another plane, which seems like a spirit to us when we interact with it) or more deviously as a conscious entity (think a formless cloud of a sentient being). I would say that much of the ails in our society are due to our unknowing interaction with these evil beings, and at present the vast majority of people on Earth are possessed – at least partially, through the cerebellum typically – by these ancient entities, hence our medical community's dismay when we “shine the light” on these evil entities by discussing them openly. An obligatory quote, 'For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.' ~ Ephesians, 6:12.
I have been on two different medications for "schizophrenia", one being haloperidol (or Haldol), and the second being aripiprazole (or Abilify). The first drug (Haldol) seems to have the affect of "quieting" the "schizophrenic" symptoms by making it more difficult to "connect" with one's "spirit", thus lessening the "voices and visions" to the point that they are easily ignored. I was on this particular drug for about four years. The side-effects were mild-to-nil for myself, but it can cause muscle tremors/spasming depending on the dosage. I then spent about five years without being on drugs for schizophrenia, though on an anti-anxiety drug, Paxil, while working in an inbound call center. I was then again put on schizophrenic drugs, while being out of work and I "relapsed", or the "spirits" wouldn't leave me alone. The second drug I was prescribed was Abilify (or as I like to think of it, Avilify, because it helps "evil spirits" in their possession attempts). Abilify seems to go one step further than Haldol, in that it actually DISCONNECTS the physical body from one's spirit, thus making spiritual possession even easier. Spiritually, I found that Abilify also has the affect of "containing" your spirit (like in a box) where it is then "relocated" at the desire of the possessing spirits. Fortunately, from my understanding, my "spirit" was "old" enough to fight off this containment, and make a "new" (different) connection to the body. I was occasionally "helped" by good spirits jumping into my time-space to "transfer" information (voices/visions) to me as well, thus keeping me in the "game." If I had the choice I would again go off the schizophrenic drugs (Abilify is quite "evil" in my opinion) but at present this is not an option.
Upon having a conversation with my “spirit guides” as well as some “experiences” it would appear that some foods have a “protective” effect against “spiritual possession.” Notably limes (not key-limes I might add which can make things worse) have a “cleansing” effect for the spirit/soul and appear to actually “ward” offending spirits from attempting any influence on a person's mind/body/soul. I have started looking for limes at the supermarkets, but it appears to be somewhat important to avoid the “key lime” variation. The key-lime apparently allows a “possessing” spirit easy entry into a person if the “key” is known, and the “default key” is apparently well known. I have run across some spirits who have the ability to “modify” the “key” (IE via a type of “encryption” and/or “encoding”) to keep most offending possessing spirits away. Some more advanced spirits would even turn the key-lime “barrier” inside-out and then modify the “key” to sort of “play” with any “unwise” possession attempts by a “younger” spirit who could then not escape from being “contained” by the “elder” spirit.
Some crystals apparently have an spiritual effect, though my experience here is lacking. I suppose you can somewhat think of the “kryptonite” against “superman” effect and a “crystal” that seems to be “keyed” to a specific spirit and/or “family type.” Black pepper is also a very useful spice and relatively inexpensive. It appears to be “hot” to spirits while out of a physical body when they come into contact and will avoid fairly quickly. Of course someone who tends to eat spicy food (IE black pepper, red chillies, paprika, etc) will be much more difficult for offending spirits to possess, and it is not just out-of-body spirits who would be affected. This might explain the East Asian (especially India) habit of eating spicy foods, as their cultures are some of the oldest in the world and may have dealt with some “spiritual wars” of the past. Cinnamon is also an irritating spice to “evil spirits” (out-of-body or “possessing”) and has some uses an an “application” to the skin/hair – in powdered form – in particularly troublesome circumstances. One might recall stories of Buddhist monks burning cinnamon sticks into their scalps as an example. If you have ever seen the “spoon of cinnamon” challenge videos on the Internet, you will get an idea of how irritating it is to “mischievous” spirits.
Also apparently of great importance is the metal/element silver. Silver ions in the body are a huge obstacle for any attempt by a “spirit” (other than ones own spirit) to enter another's “spirit body”, whether “mischievous” or not. The simple act of wearing a silver chain on the skin will eventually lead to absorption of some silver ions through the skin “membrane”, as I have read on the Internet in various locations, the skin is actually considered the body's largest “organ” and is not as “inert” as the medical community might like us to believe. And of course “tattoos” are to be avoided because it gives “unwanted” spirits a “pathway” to enter your body. Also of interest are the ear canals, which can also be used by “spirits” to enter a person, and ear-wax is apparently a significant obstacle for this type of entry. And of course the old – enabled – silver crucifix and/or “blessed” object is a deterrent for certain types of spirits (notably “demonic”), though I should mention that even though a specific “spirit” might be of “demon” type or “spirit body”, it does not always mean that said “spirit” is good or bad (though there will definitely be a bias and/or leaning towards “mischievous” in almost all cases) but it is a specific present “experience” for that particular “spirit” at that point in time. From my understanding, some of the “oldest” spirits (pre-existing even the physical universe) have been both “demonic” spiritual types, as well as “angelic” spiritual types at one point or another in their progression as spiritual children of “Creation”, and are some of the most “balanced” and “wise” spirits in existence, since it often requires life “experience” to understand another beings point of view. For example this might be where the well known “empathetic” characteristics of some of the most powerful spiritual beings come from, such as the – all encompassing love – of the original Creator of the known universe, some might know as “God.”
Some other noteworthy examples of wards against evil spirits are: keeping a cloths hanger on the floor near the door (flat end out), leaving the lights on at night and even during the day, and some types of house plants are very effective as spiritual wards. I should also mention the general feelings of wholesome goodness, love, and “good” music are also an effective deterrent against evil spirits.
