Cheap-Ass Beer Review Smackdown Party Festival 2017: Pabst Blue Ribbon vs Coors Banquet

jessamynorchard (67)in #review • 7 years ago

Coors Banquetvs.Pabst Blue Ribbon

...gather up those pennies, it's time to drink beer!

Pabst Blue Ribbon (PBR)

Playing shows and drinking PBR: they go together like peas and carrots to me. (Photo captured by @jasonrussell)

History Lesson Time

Well, the can isn't lying to you when it says prominently that it was "Established in Milwaukee in 1844," and the beer bottles themselves, between the years of 1882 and 1916, actually had a literal blue ribbon tied around it. In 1892, during PBR's glory days, the brewing company actually needed to purchase a million feet of silk to make the ribbon to keep up with the demand of their beer. Makes sense that they just print it on there now.

Vintage marketing at its absolute finest.

A Few Fun Facts About PBR

Pabst Blue Ribbon has always claimed it was named "America's Best Beer" at the World's Columbian Exposition in Chicago in 1893, however, the actual truth of whether or not the beer won any award at the event at all is unclear--some even stating no such award was even given out at that fair.
Pabst Brewing Company was originally Best Brewing. The name was changed to Pabst in 1890 after the son-in-law of the Best company took over the brewery.
Resurgence in PBR's popularity, specifically among hipsters and punk rockers, is credited by many to as the modern salvation of PBR. Because of its conservative roots, PBR is resistant to completely embrace that alternative image, so they utilize more subtle sponsorship marketing of alternative and artistically driven events. They intentionally stay away from traditionally mainstream advertising opportunities (such as the Super Bowl), and in turn have helped steer a generation of young-ass drinkers to the old-ass beer. ("Don't come to us--we'll come to you.")
PBR's Merch Store is a perfect testament to this alternative branding, featuring everything from Snapbacks, to mitten Koozies, to a $6,400 PBR pinball machine. There is even such a thing as a PBR-branded Koozie Belt. (Basically, I want to own everything on the entire website. I wish PBR would sponsor me with their clothes.)

Let's Drink This Cheap-Ass Beer!

Appearance: 4/5

PBR is a light golden beer, fairly close to what is describe as piss colored. It is perfectly clear with small bubbles and a nice presence of carbonation even in appearance. I've always appreciated it for its watery nature, but in paying attention, I was surprised to see it had a (for a cheap-ass beer) a nice, frothy head that didn't completely dissipate. I have included an in-the-glass shot so you can see what I'm talking about. Fancy!
Inside the glass after about five minutes.

Smell: 3.5/5

Bright, crisp smell with balanced tones of grains and citrus. I can almost smell grapefruits and canoe trips.

Taste: 3.5/5

PBR has a lager taste without a heavy aftertaste. I don't like a beer that coats my mouth with a film, and PBR does the trick. The grains are more prevalent in the taste than in the nose, and the carbonation of those fun little bubbles is refreshing and makes it pop upon the first refreshing sips.

Feel: 3/5

While it has a heavier feel than some other domestic lagers, it is just watery enough to finish clean and the carbonation adds to the refreshment of the mouthfeel. Beware: While refreshingly and light when cold, this cheap-ass beer gets funky and thick in warmer temps quickly.

Overall: 4/5

PBR is a great all-around beer for those looking for something a little less conventional than the standard American domestic cheap-ass selection. It has a nice body and it actually has flavor considering the cheap-ass price. It has been and will continue to be my go-to show beer for both sides of the stage.

Cheap-Ass Rating:

3.6 out of 5

Cheap-Ass Weighted Scale:

71.6%

Beer Advocate says: 70/100

BA.com average user rating: 3.01/5

Coors Banquet

Smokey and the Bandit: This movie really is pure swill and features truly some of the worst acting ever to be captured on film, but it has some great car chases, and I still love it.

History Lesson Time

Coors Brewing Company was originally founded in 1873 in Golden Colorado. Coors is a company whose marketing has consistently posited its heritage in the Rocky Mountains, and the benefits of the water there, as what sets it apart from other American style lagers.

I couldn't pass up the opportunity to share this gem of a campaign from 1982.

A Few Fun (and not so fun) Facts About Coors Banquet

Coors adopted the name Banquet for its beer as a testament to the Colorado miners who were the first customers of the burgeoning brewing company. The story goes that when the miners would have a large gathering and a group meal, that a good beer needed to be present. Enter Coors: the banquet beer.
Founder Adolph Coors died during prohibition in 1929 and it was ruled as a suicide from jumping from a hotel window, but it has been speculated whether or not he jumped or was pushed. Some accounted his depression due to prohibition, but others contested a suicide was not in his nature. Scandalous.
In response to the old-is-new/hipster/steampunk revolution, Coors brought back not only the historically significant stubby bottles (as seen in the title image), but also the prominent feature of the word Banquet on its logo and major branding. (This line of marketing totally works on me. I am a sucker for beer bottles and labels that look old/vintage. I used to hunt for old glass bottles as a kid, so maybe that's part of it, I don't know. Regardless--I'll be discussing this further with Miller Lite next time.)

Let's Drink This Cheap-Ass Beer!

Appearance: 3/5

This beer is beautifully golden in color and almost perfectly clear. Its head quickly dissipated into what an eager achiever might call lace, but not quite. There were also almost no bubbles upon pour.

Smell: 2.75/5

At first the smell put me off, as the first notes were bitter, almost like sour citrus. As I smelled again, a crisp smell grabbed my attention and as it warmed I could smell Granny Smith apples spot-on.