Slow Your Roll To Know Your Role In Relationships

"All you want to do is fight, I'm not even doing anything." When you take the time to think about it, what you are actually saying is that you are not at all responsible for the relationship and that you would like to take the role of victim. Relationship's take a lot of work and putting it all on someone is not fair and it inevitably leaves feelings of resentment. On top of that, by victimizing yourself you essentially give up on the relationship. Your saying, "here you go, I do not want to be a part of this anymore."

In the heat of an argument, denial of accountability can easily escalate to blame and defensiveness. Communication is key in all relationships and when that breaks down simple things become huge messes that often cause deep wounds which can take a long time to heal. We all have a choice, to be in the relationship or not. You can choose to be a victim or you can choose to be a powerful partner. This is done by choosing to accept the responsibility of owning your role in the argument, regardless of the situation. If you decided to be in the relationship then truly be in it and take responsibility for caring and growing it.