Let The Men Gossip

Women are not just the ones who need relationship advice, men also do, permit me to say men need more advice than the women since more duties are bestowed upon them. If a man fail in his duty, it affect all but if a woman fail,the man can be there to give her a helping hands. The truth is "there is no perfect relationship, there is only perfect understanding of each other" this alone can stand as a pillar.

Source

The title Let the men gossip is gotten from a group i formed among my friends to discuss issues that trouble us within a relationship. To my surprise most of the issues we brought up were 80% assumption , maybe out of lack of trust, jealousy, her change in behavior and her sudden swift of interest. There was no bases. The funny part of all was "I gave advice that work but I myself was having same problem, pride couldn't let me admit the fact that I needed help,I wanted to prove perfection, not knowing perfection do not exist,it's just an idea from our head" for some time I thought holding my pains and pretending all is well was a good way to be that gentleman , people rained praises on me for being slow to anger and as that they kept stepping on me the more until I couldn't take it any longer then I realized concealing weakness kills a relationship faster.

I shall be writing from my experience, the ones that worked for me and the ones that didn't and the advice I got from elders and many relationship seminar I have attended. When it comes to relationship talk, I like to say from my experience rather than what people assume should work. And this is more focused on men, only a man knows a man thing.

Some weeks ago I was on a ward round in the hospital when an elderly nurse asked how my wife is, I smiled and told him I don't even have a girlfriend. He felt pity for me and after examining the patients and taking statistics I asked him why he felt that way for me. He told me he just doesn't wish I make the mistake he made,he told me he is going on 65 years of age yet his son is not up to 6years.i understood that part , many people like that their children is able to be independent before that age but he went further to advice me on relationship, things I would have missed in life if not that I met him, I found sense in what he said as I realize most men have made many mistake including me on the issue. This is what he told me

Date or marry a woman who loves you more than you do, if you marry or date the one you love the most, you wouldn't have chances to Chasters her when she do what is wrong. You do be afraid to correct her mistake or lead her as the head from fear of loosing her.

These was true, I was actually dating a girl I think I love more than she do, and my fear of loosing her was the reason I kept acting strong, seeing no problem with whatever she do and acting only to please her not minding how I feel.

Then he added

It's easy to fall in love with a girl you love less than a woman falling for a man she love less, so whenever you want to date, date someone who love you the most

That was my number one secret to finding real joy as a man in a relationship.

Like I earlier said no perfect relationship,there are only people who understand each other . Most times I have had quarrel with my girlfriend but after those misunderstanding I sit and recap all she said at the course of the argument and try to pick my faults and I judge my assumption from her words to see where I have mistaken. After doing that I go to apologise for my wrong. I have realized the word I am sorry could mend broken feelings faster than buying luxuries. Anytime I apologise for my wrong, it brings back the spirit of the relationship and give chance to let love flow ones again. You loose nothing by saying sorry, there is no strength in always claiming right. We are humans and so we are sure to make mistakes.

Have you ever prayed for your partner? Your partner isn't really who you maybe dating, your partner could be somewhere far and have never met in person. The only way to ensure our future partner is safe is praying for them. A simple prayer like "Lord, wherever my future partner is, put them in the part of righteousness and protect them" . This prayer is enough to start settling every dispute .

Finally, Give only what you want to receive. Whatever we give comes back to us. If you give faithfulness, faithfulness will come back to you, if you give love , love comes back, if you give respect, respect comes back vise versa. So whatever you want out of a relationship,give it out first