Knowing Yourself to Choose your Friends

As I discussed earlier in my post WHY SAY YES or NO to that FRIENDSHIP PROPOSAL — Steemit
https://steemit.com/blog/@dajin/why-say-yes-or-no-to-that-friendship-proposal how to start a new relationship but before you start a new relationship you should also be able to know yourself in other to choose wisely.

As it is said show me your friends and I will tell you who you are, you cannot be a lion walking with a sheep or will a fresh water fish go to visit his friend in salt water, in both cases that is suicide. For a relationship to flourish then it has to be with someone of liked minds. Some people go into a relationship without first analyzing what the need from that relationship and what they would offer in the course of the friendship. Let’s stop for a moment and wonder why do we become friends with John and not Peter? Which implies there is a yardstick for measuring who becomes your friend.

Three questions should be answered before venturing into a new relationship

1. The 3-W question
2. The discovery question
3. The classification question

In 3-W question one has to answer What type of friendship he/she wants? Why he/she choose John and not Peter? Where will this new friendship lead him/her and your intended friend to? Sample: a boy wants to be friends with a girl. He knows he wants a romantic relationship (what). He has chosen her because she is quite easy on the eyes (Why). He wants this relationship so that he could have casual sex with her (where). These questions help you get into a relationship that is in line with your value system, value system represents your philosophy, integrity, explains your action and the basis of your stand on issues like politics, religion, culture etc.

In Discovery question one has to answer common likes and dislikes, common goals and passions and common conviction. Like I said earlier before two people become friends then small bits of information must be willingly shared, it is at this point you get to talk to the intended friend find out about his/ her likes and dislikes, goals and passions even convictions while comparing it with yours. Sample: You love football and would go any length for it well does your new friend agree. It is said that the bond between friends grow stronger due to the things they do and time they spend together.

In Classification question one must ask himself/herself how close do I want my intended friend to be. We would all agree that there is a friend we have that we could comfortably tell all our secrets to, this group is the inner circle and there is also another friend we cannot try that with, this group is the large or outer circle.

Do well to remember that fate choose your relation but you choose your friends so choose wisely.

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