PTSD Sleeping and Levels of DreamssteemCreated with Sketch.

in #ptsd7 years ago

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At a young age, I figured that there were seven levels of dreams. Depending on what the body wanted to sort through depended on the dreams sent to me. PTSD shows no mercy when dreaming.

But PTSD expresses itself in one’s personal emotional state. Its a way of the energy body’s which there are seven of them as well, all communicating with the mind, and increases one's sense of having no boundaries of thoughts, visions, or of the body. This was extremely complicated to me as a child. It also caused all kinds of havoc with my physical body, stomach problems, not able to digest certain foods, especially dairy products. But again as a child, I could not express why, I just knew on some level I could not eat or drink certain foods. It expressed itself as a battle of wits between my parents and myself. They forced me to eat everything served to me and demanded I drink milk, and I cried. My parents seem to think I made excuses not to eat just because I didn’t like the taste of it, but it was way more than that for me. It never occurred to me to tell that I had physical problems with eating but then no one asked or was curious enough to find out why I was so rebellious it my expressions of self. The digestive problems have occurred for me since childhood, and the wrong foods causes me to have sleeping problems, and it interrupts my sleeping patterns, and gives me night sweats, nightmares and all kinds of other dream problems. Even today, I have to watch what I eat and when I eat it.

So to understand, my dreams came in many levels with many experiences. Dreams are other forms of senses have no words and are visually stimulating, and vision is a wordless communication as well. They are highly emotional and can run the full back gammon of feelings that one has when in the awaken consciousness. Although I personal have found many people do not express themselves in a healthy way while awake most seem to miss-interpret their inner self worth or express themselves in emotional being in gestures of sarcastic, jokes, passive/aggressive behaviours, or drown themselves by some sort of self medication. I could observe these in other people but all the same, I had enough going on inside myself, drowning in not being heard or understood. I just felt over looked, like I did not belong, and had no rights over my own body.

AS a child, under the age of 6, I was not aware of my dreams, but re-acted to them by sleep walking and sleep talking. There are family stories how I would come out in my sleep and do strange things to objects, like cutting things with scissors, or running objects under the sink tap. I would awake screaming in the night. I was not scared of the boggy man or anything like that, but it was the realness of the dreams. I was fully participating in them, like I was awake in the here and now just in another place and time.

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