Want to change your life? Then change your expectations!

Over the weekend, I read a great post over on Location Independent Professionals called Getting By Is Worse Than Failing which struck a chord with me.

The gist of the post is how some people have low expectations for what they want for themselves or want to be which results in them never fully realizing their potential or having the life they truly want. It’s a great post which is well worth reading (that is, after you finish reading this one ;) ) The reason why I’m writing about it is because I truly believe one of the main reasons why most people don’t achieve much in their life is because of their expectations. I know because I have been guilty of it myself.

            

What Are Your Expectations?

So what are your expectations in life? This can be a difficult question to answer because it makes you take an objective look at your life. Are your expectations taking you forward or are they keeping you complacent? Are they inspiring to take your life to the next level or are they keeping you safe in your “comfort zone”?

Being honest about your expectations can be difficult for some. The reason why it’s so hard is because we as human beings have a tendency to stay where it’s comfortable. “Comfortable” as it applies here could be as simple as having a roof over your head and cable TV. For some, it could be all of that plus eating out at a restaurant once in a while plus splurging on a DVD here and there. For others, it could be a nice house in the suburbs with two cars, kids in a decent school, and a (seemingly) secure upper-management job which allows you and the family to take a nice summer vacation.

Regardless of what your “comfortable zone” is, it will never change unless you admit to yourself that it has to change. For some, their current situation works for them because it meets their expectations. They are quite content with the way things are. But if you are not content with the way your life is going or you know you are not living the life you’ve always wanted- then you have to admit to yourself things have to change before it can.

                   

Changing To Meet Your Expectations

I’m sure you know of someone who is living well below their potential. They could be very intelligent or have a talent or have high-in-demand set of skills but for some reason, they are living a life which doesn’t fully utilize their potential. They say they want to change or that they know they can do better but they never do. Why is that? It is because they associate more pain and fear to changing their expectations than they do to how their life currently is.

I think everyone has faced this situation before. I know I have! There have been times when I knew my expectations were holding me back, but I always found some way to justify not following through with changing them. And this was because I knew by doing so, it would take me out of my “comfort zone”.

A prime example of this would be the first couple of times I tried to quit smoking. I knew in my head I had to quit. It was way too expensive, it was affecting my health, and it was becoming a real hassle to do it anywhere. Plus, I knew I could do it if I honestly tried. But whenever I tried, I didn’t give 100% because it was forcing me to leave my “comfort zone”. It wasn’t till I committed myself to changing that I finally quite smoking. I expected more out of myself and knew smoking was a road block I had to get around. Instead of associating pain to not smoking and the comfort it brought me, I began associating pain to smoking and all the negatives associated with it. Not saying it was easy but doing this did help me kick the habit.

        

Creating New Expectations

I’ll be the first to admit, change is sometimes not easy. It forces us into territory we are not familiar with. But if you have reached a point where you realize your current expectations are holding you back in some area of your life- then you have to create new expectations! And this is not as hard as you may think.

For example, my husband and I bought our current house about three years ago. It’s a fairly old house in need of some TLC. One of the areas we’ve been wanting to fix is the bathroom on the main floor. Not that it isn’t usable but it’s in need of some cosmetic repairs: there is some sheet rock missing from one of the walls, the decor is embarrassingly outdated, and such. But we were so use to it, we really didn’t pay it any mind. We were “comfortable” with it. That was till a couple of weeks ago when we were talking about the house and we started talking about the bathroom. We both came to the realization we were putting off fixing it because we were so use to the state it is in. It didn’t bother us that it looked like crap! Needless to say, both of us got pretty mad at ourselves for letting it stay in its current state for so long. Now, we’re about a week away from gutting it and starting from scratch. And it is all because we changed our expectations about it.

                  

Our expectations are a controlling force in our lives. Is yours taking you towards the life you want to have or are they keeping you stuck in your “comfort zone”? Tell us about your expectations and how they are helping you reach your goals in the Comments below. Thanks!