Be stealth
Humans are social creatures it's just how were programmed. Even those that protest that they are "introverted" still long for human interaction and companionship to a degree. Many of us have friends and relatives that we share many of our personal thoughts, goals and ideas with. This sharing of ideas harnesses a sense of "belonging" and community with other people.it's great for our emotional circuits and psychology. However you don't want to get too carried away with detailing everything about you.
Allow me to get more nuanced here.
Shit man you need to be stealth and careful what information you tell certain people, even family members. I say this because you never know who is out to sabotage, influence, or prevent what you're going towards. Let's say you're an 18 year old wanting to take up boxing and before even experimenting in it you tell your friends. Your friends joke around and tell you that you'd get your ass handed to you and shouldn't do it. Mind you, boxing is an interest of yours and you haven't even tried it yet. The opinion of your supposed friends prevented you from trying out boxing
So what in the blue hell happened here? The issue here is you didn't try it out to see if you liked it, you looked for outside validation to see if your interest in boxing was "okay." In this scenario not only did your friends sabotage your boxing endeavors, but you did as well. You allowed the social pressure to sway your judgment.
Even I am guilty of this. I might share information with someone about something I plan on doing. However I don't think of the repercussions of it.
Ladies and gentlemen there are people in this world that don't want you to succeed and well, that could be anyone. You never know who doesn't have your best interests at heart. You never know who doesn't want you to blossom.
Be stealth, always ask yourself "Does this person NEED to know this or that about me?" "How would this information about me serve this person?"
I'm not saying to act like a mime and never speak to anyone. I'm not saying to not ask friends and family for advice because that's important. I'm conveying that there is certain information you don't have to share right away or even at all.
And believe it or not, people revere you as important and may respect you more the less you share.
Until next time,
-J
Hey man, I like your post and I can recognize myself in it, but I disagree as well.
If someone doesn't do something because his friends discourage him, I'd say that he doesn't want it bad enough or that he has confidence issues.
You said it yourself: "You looked for outside validation". Being stealth would only fix the symptom, not the cause.
I have this problem myself. Fixing the cause is tough. I have been following the easy (symptom fixing) way in a certain part of my life, but that doesn't mean that it's the right thing to do...