RE: Little Ru on Risks and Expectations
Dear, Erica, thank you for your wonderful comment!!! :D It's so meaningful and seta a whole new avalanche of questions.
Have you ever heard someone shout, "Oh, how wonderful, that's typical of you! How beautiful, your helpful nature has saved the situation!
Hahha, no, I haven't! In my entire life! :D
You are right that things are controversial. When it comes to one sphere of public life nations could behave in a certain way and demonstrate certain beliefs and at the same time people within that nation could act accordingly to other beliefs in their private lives . When I researched this nation character thing I stumbled upon research on British optimism. It showed that the Brits are optimistic when it comes to their private lives and plans, but at the same time they are pessimistic when it comes to larger events. So they have optimism and pessimism at the same time as a national character.
There is often a demand for a "strong hand", an expression that was coined in the early 2000s by our SPD Chancellor Gerhard Schröder, as much as my memory does not deceive me.
Bulgarians also talk about the need of the strong hand and rules. You can also hear someone saying "Look at the Germans (or the Swedes, or the Americans). They have rules and laws in their country!" But at the same time, we don't follow rules very much and people here tend to break the law as it's the norm on a daily basis (e.g. not following the speed limits, not paying their taxes, giving and taking bribes, parking wherever they want, etc.). And if there is a "strong hand" there would be a huge wave of indignation against it.
I often find that what people articulate to be their beliefs and mindsets often differ with what they do. I think that most of the time we are not completely aware of who we are - sometimes we cannot exactly tell the difference between who we wish to be and what our behavior says about us. So, I am always a bit skeptic when it comes to self-reports :)
It's very interesting what you say about mothers (parents) interventions. I have always thought that Germans and Brits intervene much slower than Bulgarians and Balkan parents as a whole. We have many German tourists in my home town during the summer and I have always been amazed how little they intervene with their children. Here we intervene immediately. You hear the word "No" everywhere. "Don't run", "Don't climb", "Don't touch". It looks like our parental style is all about the "don'ts". Which is something that terrifies me? I tried to fight it. It's against my understanding of bringing up a happy child :) I think it has to do with our high level of uncertanty avoidance. We cannot bear to watch and wait to see what the children will do.
It is very difficult to try to not be this kind of parent with the pressure of the rest of the parents and the society as a whole. You can easily get a piece of parental advice everywhere and by everyone here. People look at children as if they are everyone's children. I think that it has to do with our "collectivism". I wonder is it like this in Germany, where the society is rather individualistic?
So, thanks again for your wonderful comment. I am sorry that my response is a bit late. I couldn't get to Steemit these days.
Hugs for you and for your grown boy!