Sometimes I like to write myself reminders.
Perhaps one day I will truly master this awareness!

Whenever you feel stuck in a situation that doesn't feel good, especially in circumstances that appear to be someone else's fault--instead of pointing the finger--the best, most effective and beneficial thing you can do is to look within and take responsibility for yourself.

For example:

If you feel your are being disrespected--ask yourself-- "Am I disrespecting myself?"  Just remember, you put yourself in the situation in the first place!

If you feel abandoned-- ask yourself-- "Am I abandoning myself?"  If you're not looking out for your own best interests and loving yourself unconditionally, you've abandoned yourself.

If you feel manipulated -- ask yourself-- "Do I get what I want by manipulating situations or others?" If you're trying to blame someone else for your problems and trying to get them to change to make yourself feel better--you're being a manipulator!!

If you take responsibility for putting yourself in the situation, being a part of an exchange, or simply even knowing that everything in your existence is about you, then you can become empowered to make change.  Blaming, waiting, or demanding others to change will not solve your problems.  If you don't take responsibility, the same situation will likely reappear in your reality in some other form, and will likely be even more magnified the next time,  as you have not addressed the issue within that caused it in the first place.

It's hard for people to see that they are the true cause of their own discomfort.  It's often difficult to understand how the actions of others reflect our own responsiblity because we have been trained that everything is on the outside of us.  But the truth is that everything in our existence is about us, every relationship, every conversation, everything!!!  Our lives unfold in accordance with our inner world, our experiences, ideas, traumas, thoughts and perceptions.  We are the creators of our own realities!  Acknowledging that and taking responsibility is the only real solution.

Other people are our own best mirrors, and they show us what we need to know about ourselves.  We have the perfect opportunity to dissect the real root of the problem.  Before lashing out, look within.  

Once we take responsibility for our lives, we are no longer victims and we regain the power.  There is no one else to blame.  No judgment is needed --  see it for what it is, acknowledge it, accept it, change it.   Judgment always adds another layer of dysfunction on top of the perceived existing problem, so just being committed to doing better from here on out keeps it simple.

I believe we are on this planet to experience unconditional love -- and that love begins with ourselves.  Doing the inner work has vast rewards, including a freer mind, a healthier body, a fulfilled soul and a more rewarding all-around experience.

I often get advice from a very wise and benevolent friend of mine @quinneaker.  Two of my favorite quotes from him are:

"It's all energy and it's all in alignment!" and
"There are no problems, just opportunities for solutions!"   

AHO!!!

I highly recommend reading @quinneaker's blog:  "If You are Feeling Lonely at the Holidays or Any Day, Consider This: There Is No One to Count on BUT Yourself"