RE: Why some people are unable to relate and engage with others?
This is really something I actually struggle with - but for me I think it's less about having social skills than just a pathetic lack of confidence.
Basically, if I'm at a party full of people, I clam right up. I don't know what to say - I feel like I don't really have anything worth saying, if I'm really being honest. But if someone starts talking to me, or if it's a small gathering (like less than 5 people), or if I become the center of attention for whatever reason, then it's all good! I am actually really good at conversation, solving problems, being empathetic... it's what makes me really good at my job, even! But when it comes to social situations I just don't have the confidence to get the ball rolling in the first place. It's a real hindrance, and something I know I have to work on.
Perhaps what you have is not a lack of social skills, but a fear of public speaking, which is totally normal in my opinion.
Breaking the ice is the most difficult, once its done everything gets easier and the interaction just happens on its own.
hmm.. I don't know if I'd characterize it as a fear of public speaking. I perform live as a singer and actually love talking in front of crowds. It's more like, well, if it the focus isn't on me to begin with, then I get lost. I'm weird. hahah