Nor Lender Be

Proverbs 6:1-5 (KJV)
My son, if thou be surety for thy friend, if thou hast stricken thy hand with a stranger,
Thou art snared with the words of thy mouth, thou art taken with the words of thy mouth.
Do this now, my son, and deliver thyself, when thou art come into the hand of thy friend; go, humble thyself, and make sure thy friend.
Give not sleep to thine eyes, nor slumber to thine eyelids.
Deliver thyself as a roe from the hand of the hunter, and as a bird from the hand of the fowler.

Some time just before I became a Christian, I was just barely 18 years old, I found myself in some trouble financially.

I frankly can’t remember what it was right now, but it was a pretty regular problem of mine at about that time in my life.

I had a very good friend, Jake Long, who offered to help me out and pay whatever debt I owed.

Jake Long was just about the kindest person any of us could imagine.

He was only a year older than me, but he was a pretty mature 19 year old.

Jake had lent me the money with no strings attached; just pay him back whenever I could.

It did not take me very long to figure out that, the way things were going, I wouldn’t ever be able to pay him back.
Jake wasn’t pressuring me for his money
All of my bills were

I kept putting off paying Jake because:
· The electric bill wouldn’t let me put them off
· The telephone bill wouldn’t let me put them off
· The trailer bill wouldn’t let me put them off
· The heat bill wouldn’t let me put them off

I had to buy gas to drive to work and I had to buy some food to survive.

Of all the people I owed money too, Jake was the only one who didn’t demand I pay him back.

I do not recall Jake ever bringing up his money.
But I began to feel guilty.

I knew I owed him and I figured he knew I owed him too.

I imagined that if I felt guilty about owing him, he felt angry that I had not paid him, and it wasn’t long before I did not want to be around one of the best friends I had ever had.

I avoided him:
· I stopped going to his place and
· I started pretending I wasn’t home when he came to mine

To be honest, I do not remember how the think was resolved.

I do remember the lesson I learned from the experience.

It wasn’t until even later that I learned what I had learned is a biblical principle.

*The word surety comes from a Hebrew word that means, “to braid.” We would probably understand it best as “co-signer.”

We are going to see the other side of this later on as we progress through the Proverbs.

This passage addresses the question of what to do if we find ourselves as the lender, rather than the borrower.

More accurately, if you have secured someone else’s loan.

I. THE PROBLEM WITH IT
Vs 1-2
It is a snare.

Here’s the description:
A friend has needed some assistance – the most common sort would be financial.

You have bound yourself to that friend, and you have made an agreement with a stranger, in our day probably a bank.

The Bible says that you are now in a trap – a snare.

Let me give you a couple of things to think about:
A. The guy who lends the money is a stranger
· Even if you think of him as a friend
· Even if you have known him for years and go by a first name basis
· Even if he attends your church and calls you “Brother”

The moment he loans you that money he takes the professional role of “stranger.”

You probably shook hands when you signed the papers, but it wasn’t friendly.

· You are legally and contractually bound to repay that money and
· He is legally and officially bound to see that you do

That obligation will come before
· first names,
· church memberships and
· family of God.

B. That “friend” you co-signed for has led you into their own trap
Doesn’t matter how good the friendship is:
· It might be a family member
· It might be someone you would give your life for

Securing anyone’s loan binds you to their snare.

Now the Proverb gives
II. THE SOLUTION TO IT
Proverbs 6:3 (KJV)
Do this now, my son, and deliver thyself, when thou art come into the hand of thy friend; go, humble thyself, and make sure thy friend.

You have to deliver yourself from the snare and the passage gives us to indications about how to do that:
A. Notice the phrase “humble thyself.”
This is the one who is the surety – the co-signer.

You don’t require the person you cosigned for to be humble and fix it.

You humble yourself and fix it.

You take the humble road.

You fix the situation – you don’t ask them to get you out of the snare, you do that yourself and you do it in a way that leave the other in good shape.

You humble yourself.

B. And make sure thy friend
Let me just get straight to the chase on this – that means you pay the loan.

That’s the only way to get out of the snare and leave your friend uninjured.

If you don’t have the money to pay it off, then get a loan so that the whole burden is on you and not your friend.

The reason is because otherwise, you are always at the mercy of that friend to make the loan payments.

If this sounds harsh…..

That brings me to my last point,
III. THE URGENCY OF IT
Proverbs 6:4-5 (KJV)
Give not sleep to thine eyes, nor slumber to thine eyelids.
Deliver thyself as a roe from the hand of the hunter, and as a bird from the hand of the fowler.

The urgency of delivering oneself from this snare brings me to a final thought, which is –

The best way to fix the problem is to never be a co-signer.

That does not mean we must never be generous, it just means we must be truly generous.

If we have it in our power to help a friend in need, and if God puts it in our heart to help them, then help them indeed.

*Give them what they need.
· If you believe they need it and
· If you have it in your power to meet the need and
· If you believe God wants you to help them with the need

*Then give them what they need
· No strings attached
· No loan without interest
· No, “You can pay me back when you can”

Give it to them.

The Christian principle is that they would then give to you in your future time of need – but that can’t be expected.

· Be humble
· Be trusting of God and
Either give to them because God leads you to or else, humbly refuse to do what you can’t really do anyway.