Free to be you...

in powerhousecreatives •  20 days ago 

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For as far back as I can remember, my personality (or presence if you will) has raised eyebrows and turned heads. I have always been that square peg in a round hole. People have forever told me I either dress funny, talk too much, am too opinionated, too loud, too intense or too something or another. Growing up, having a personality that somewhat “stood out” was not made any easier by being a strawberry blonde with freckles… because as any redhead with freckles will know, we are probably the most ridiculed individuals as kids – now take that and couple it with being a little bit “outside of the box” individual, it did not make general social acceptance very forthcoming.

There was a time in my life when this used to worry me, hurt me and leave me feeling like an outcast – which in turn caused me to begin naturally gravitating to other “square pegs” in their round holes. Moving myself away from the mainstream crowds of people, I think was possibly the best thing I ever did for myself as a spiritual being. It taught me to appreciate the depth of a person and not their brand name sneakers or flashy car. It taught me to look beyond the surface and dig!

When you start to do this, you gain insight like no other and on top of that, you meet some truly amazing people who teach you a lot about yourself too and when you begin to learn about yourself, you begin to accept yourself with all your quirks.

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One of the biggest things I have ever had to accept about myself was that I think differently to most people and therefore express myself quite differently. I have learnt to understand that this is a gift – something to have an enormous amount of gratitude for – not something to be ashamed, embarrassed by or scared of. It is what makes me who I am. It is the compilation of Jayne. If I was not precisely the way I am, I would not be able to embrace the gifts I have been afforded.

Ever heard of automatic writing? It is the act of writing from spirit. You are holding the pen and paper, but are not controlling it. You are not dictating the words which find their way on to the paper. It is a completely spirit driven experience!

There are many times when I write that it “almost” feels a little like this, but I know it is not quite. However… the opposite can be said for when I speak to people. I have always been a “people watcher”… No! Not the stalker kind lol… I simply love to observe people. Every single one of us has a story, and our “day to day actions” are expressive depictions of precisely that. From the time we wake up, (wherever we may wake up and however we wake up) through to the time we close our eyes through sheer exhaustion or out of choice – we continue to tell our tale…..

My enjoyment in the observation of this – is because the observation itself is what allows me to see beyond the skin. It is what affords me the opportunity to look at the REAL person… you know – the one underneath all the fashion, fancy and pretense. I like REAL people – You know…The ones that give of themselves. The ones that tell it like it is. The ones that are brave enough to take off their masks and let the world see them for who they are no matter what anybody thinks! But I am completely intrigued by all the rest, honest and not. Many of them, I would never get the opportunity to even speak to – so observation and summation is all that is granted – but it is wildy educational to say the very least.

I suppose in many respects it is because of this natural inclination of mine that many people seem to gravitate toward me to for problem solving in matters relating to their own lives. It is in these situations that I have realised, I switch into “auto mode”. So much so, that there are many occasions where after the fact, I cannot recall what I have advised. It is really as though my “active self” gets thrown into the back of the room and the words just roll off my tongue.

I do not think about anything that I say - I do not plan it, prepare it, or rehearse it, yet there it is… Sometimes it is gentle and others, completely brutal. I am often judged for this because for the most part… people do not like to hear the truth… no matter HOW it is delivered!

I have learnt to embrace this “ability” irrespective of outside opinion and judgement and it is precisely this skill set that has enabled me to be who I am and achieve the things that I do. If I did not have it, I would be a VERY different person today, sitting in an entirely different circumstance.

I have (after many years) learnt to swallow the fact that even though I may not FULLY understand something, does NOT mean it holds any less relevance. I know that many will NEVER truly understand me, but for me, what matters is that I understand myself now.

It is a wonderful revelation in one’s life when you can let go of the judgements of others, smile at yourself in the mirror and trust that you are precisely who you should be.

❤❤❤

Until next time...
Much Love from Cape Town, South Africa xxx
Jaynielea

FOUNDER OF THE POWERHOUSE CREATIVES & STEEM SOUTH AFRICA

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Oh you are so wise @jaynie :) Lucky to have figured all of this out at such a young age. Many never reach this point, so I'm glad you have. I was also a "round peg" trying to fit in... I do think it made me stronger. The strength was something I failed to recognize until in my life. Beautiful write, wonderful words of wisdom.

Thank you!!!! and I am so glad this resonated with you xxx

Thanks for share your thoughts.

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And thank you for stopping by to read it @shuvo35 :) - it is always appreciated!

@jaynie - you are indeed a unique force on this community, never afraid to put it out there or fight for what you believe in. We need more square pegs who DON'T strive to fit in the round holes.

WOW! That literally brought tears to my eyes! What a beautiful thing to say!!! I am not even sure what to say in response to that @blueeyes8960 - but I will say a very big thank you! xoxoxo

If you don't say it the way you see it, many will walk over you @jaynie you are fortunate having an outgoing nature.

That is very true @joanstewart - however, I will say that despite the way many perceive me... I am actually quite the introvert - shocker I know haha!

We have a lot in common, wow!

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Just stop copying me already man....pfffff ;)

🤣🤣🤣 I can't help it! I mirror excellence!

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hehehehe xxx

I agree jaynie, from what I've known of you I find that you are different in the best way, one that I respect. I've been doing automatic writing for quite a while now and have got to the point where I feel I am close to a magic outpouring, but first I have to go beyond my fear of completely letting go and writing from my deepest soul.

What a wonderful thing to say @wales, thank you!

That sounds fantastic and also like you are about to cross that threshold. I have no doubt of that Wales, you are a brilliant writer! LET IT ALL GOOOOO!!!! haha :)

Would you believe that I am a shy guy? Accepted myself as an outcast in my teens already. A difficult and tough life has taught me to rely only on myself and like you I study people and their quirks. Especially when they drop their masks and come crying for help.
But the main thing that I have learned is to beware of my right brained mind and to follow my heart.
You have done very well for yourself by accepting who and what you are and you have climbed the mountains in your life.
But I still think that we are total loners in life.
Blessings!

the main thing that I have learned is to beware of my right brained mind and to follow my heart.

Oh I love that SO much!!!!!

Yes, you are right... I will forever be a loner.

xxx

Same here my friend.
Have a good night.
Blessings to you guys!

I believe, without those great qualities that you doubted before, we would not have crossed path... So don't ever change @jaynie, be loud and proud!

LOVE YOU!!! You are such a positive wave of magnitude yourself and I am loving seeing how you are coming into your own - loud and proud too! ;) xxxxxxxxxxxxx

hahahahahahaha!!!!

You are a born writer @jaynie

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That is quite a compliment @jurich - I am sure many would disagree lol - but thank your for the lovely compliment nonetheless! x

Funny but I always felt like the odd one out as a child so would try and shy away from the other kids but how liberating it was when I started to feel comfortable in my own skin! Celebrate your difference, that confidence is what makes you a born leader!

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Celebrate your difference

LOVE IT!

and thank you!!!

Feel you, even as a man i face all these stereotypes of how i should behave in certain social situations.

Sometimes, it's just cool to be laidback...and weird haha

Yeah I am pretty good with being weird nowadays haha!!! ;) Thanks for stopping by @zen.fit xxx

The wonder of getting older... you are so thankful for other things that you do realize there are a lot of worse things than a few extra kg or thinning hair and you just enjoy life.

Well, hon - I do my best hey! One day at a time as they say! MWAH! Hope you are having a fabulous weekend!

  ·  19 days ago (edited)

Great post..I also grew up with freckles and ginger hair. After the years passed also accepted who I was and that we are all created unique.

I think us "gingers" took massive stain hahaha!!! But hey, I will also say that we are some of the most vivacious, tenacious and character-filled individuals I have ever met! Must be the built in flame ;)

So true....really free from that baggage now...and as u say free2bme🍒🎀

Also the freckles really were a problem for me ..got more in the summer. Funny ..no freckles now!!

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Thank you @freedomtowrite and @innerblocks xxx

Reading this, I know why I'm instantly comfortable chatting with you...you remind me so much of my sweet husband, @freedompoint. He works differently, his brain operates differently, and he'll always tell you the truth no matter how it makes you feel...because the truth is more important than anything. Because of this, so many people come to him to problem solve. They need that different approach to life.

It's funny because also while reading this, I found that I'm drawn to people that live outside the box. While I'm a person that can morph from box to box. Maybe that makes me more understanding...I want ever judge you.

Life is uncanny really isn't it! How we naturally gravitate towards those that best feed our souls - and how such people also "suddenly" and (not randomly) come into our sphere of existence. :) You, remind me a LOT of my friend Kimmie. She was on Steem but left. I should actually check if you are anywhere near one another... haha... she and her husband Ray own the "Papa Murphy's" pizza chain. Thank you for you @freedomtowrite! I am smiling as I type this - grateful to have met you both! xxx Hope you are both having a fantabulous weekend! MWAH!

So true! People come into our lives in the perfect season.

So, the first time I read I read this I thought your friend, Kimmie, owned a part of the franchise, but she owns the whole pizza chain?? Dang! We love Papa Murphy's haha. I wonder what state she's in....we are in Michigan. 😀

I stand to be corrected, but I know they own many branches - so not 100% sure if it is the franchise itself, or perhaps just all the one's in their vicinity. I think they are in Illinois.

Ohhhh okay haha Yeah, Illinois isn't too far. Well, it's not close, but it's not on the other side of America or anything haha

That’s this happened to us ( yes i experienced the same in school ) well i can handle that but when my son comes home being bullied my hart gets ripped out and than telling him mum had the same doesn’t work , fukkers

yeah kids can truly be cruel!!! but, look how tough we are now honey xxx - however, yes... agreed on the "mama bear" part haha x

Hello @jaynie, thank you for sharing this creative work! We just stopped by to say that you've been upvoted by the @creativecrypto magazine. The Creative Crypto is all about art on the blockchain and learning from creatives like you. Looking forward to crossing paths again soon. Steem on!

Thank you!!!! xxx