RE: Freaky Fridays
Not going to lie, keeping a deep connection with multiple people takes a lot of effort and scheduling. I have recently labeled one of my relationships as my primary. This relationship, in particular, is one I want to hold on to as long as I can and this is the one I put the most effort into. We have been fucking for over 12 years on and off. The time we spend apart is tough but every time we see each other it's like no time has passed. I feel like that's how all relationship should be. I have lovers that I see every month and some I see 3 or 4 times a year. It's just keeping an open form of communication and letting everyone know that you care.
Jealousy drives from desire, selfishness and having a sense of possession. If you can step back and ask yourself why you're jealous, you can look at it in a more logical sense. Awhile ago he was telling me about some girls tight pussy and in my head, I'm saying, "is he telling me this because of he likes her pussy more than mine or is it because he's trying to tell me to tighten mine up". But in all actuality, he's just sharing an experience, He's telling me about something he's enjoying and all I want is for him to be happy. It doesn't matter if it's with or without me. I love him to a ridiculous amount and why would I hold him back from pleasure or love. If someone could love him better than me...wow....holy moly lol get it! I think he's such an amazing person, he has a kick-ass personality, a gorgeous body, and he's intelligent, and I want to share him with the world. It would be a shame to keep this man to myself...people need to know about his guy lol. That's how I see him.
Gotcha. I don’t think I could do that, to be honest. I’m married, and love my wife to the ends of the universe...but at the same time, I often feel attracted to other women (a natural thing). I never take it further than friendship, but maintaining a connection with a female outside of my marriage often seems like more work than it is with my wife. I could probably be accused of an “emotional affair” or two, but in the end I always end up realizing it was more lust than anything else, and I push the other person away.
The one connection I did have that could have led to something was with a female friend I’d had for a while before I met my wife. When I started dating my wife, this friend suddenly started coming on to me (after years of keeping me in the friend zone). She would regularly tease me, ask me if I ever thought about having sex with her. I was honest, and said I did (jacked off all the time to thoughts of her). Long story short, maintaining that kind of connection was too difficult. And my wife sensed that my attention was divided.
There’s some other stuff that happened that led to me needing to sever most ties to her. But, I still think about that other girl from time to time. If she were to come to my neck of the woods, I can’t say I would be able to resist temptation (does that make me evil?).
The truth is that I used to think I was aspirationally polyamorous...but really, I was just incredibly horny. I need the deep, committed connection with one person. I could probably maintain one outside. But eventually, I’d screw up one, or the other, or both...and end up alone.
Monogamy is a beautiful thing. There is no wrong way to love and if needing one person to love you and only you unconditionally that's perfect and just how it needs to be for your life.
But there's nothing wrong with being incredibly horny. I'm horny 90% of the time and am always thinking of sex. I find the way people approach me in the bedroom, is the same way they approach me in real life. If I can dominate a man in conversation chances are they will let me dominate them in bed. If my partner is willing to try new thing, communicate to me what they want, or even teach me something they like for me to do. These partners are my favorite and I typically will continue to keep relations with them. If you time to time still think about this other girl, you should probably ask yourself what's lacking in the relationship you're in. What about your relationship is making you think about someone else. I'm sure if you vowed to spend the rest of your life with another person and they did the same. Your wife will probably be willing to do anything for you.
It was definitely her body type that was making me think about others. I was the kind of guy who had dated women with average breasts, and made out with a Thai-American girl whose tits were as big as basketballs. My first Korean girlfriend was way out of my league at the time, had a rockin’ body - great shape, great chest. I definitely judged partners by their body more than their personality, for far too long.
When I fell in love with my wife, I was fooled by her bra - the first time we fucked, she took off her bra and said, “You want me to get surgery, don’t you?” She was almost flat-chested. By that point, though, I was already deeply in love with her (we’d talked a LOT before actually getting together), and said, “Nah.”
To this day, I tell her I don’t want her to get surgery when she brings up the subject (and plastic surgery in Korea is so common that it’s not really that taboo of a topic). But, I was definitely having issues with being attracted to this or that woman with even slightly larger breasts...because I remembered what I was missing.
(One advantage of getting married? The bachelor party that ended at a strip club...and a little private time in the VIP back room...Nuff said!)
Little by little, though, I’ve really come to appreciate her body as a whole. I mean, she always had a great body line. Adorable facial features. Nice ass. It was just the chest. And, while I definitely still struggle and definitely fantasize, I incorporate less of that into sex.
I still often fantasize to climax, but the way I see it, she doesn’t know that, and doesn’t need to. If she thinks I’m cumming because of her, well...+/- 85% of it is because of her. She’s happy (and always satisfied), and I’m happy and satisfied. So, things are better than they used to be.
If plastic surgery isn’t that weird of a topic and she suggests getting fake tits. Why not let her get them? Sounds like it would make her have more selfasteem and it sounds like you’d like too
Well, the thing with her is that it feels like she’s fishing for approval for who she is...which I am only too happy to give. Before we met, her grandmother once gave her money for surgery, and she used it to buy a new MacBook Pro instead (she’s a graphic designer). I love her for stuff like that. I would be pleased, sure, but at the same time...I did fall in love with her as she is.
If one day, she mentions it and then truly pushes it, I won’t stand in her way (I have told her that if she wants it, I won’t be upset at all!). It’s really not up to me, though; she could start the process tomorrow if she decided to. While she’s got a complex about her chest, I think she also feels secure enough with me that she dismisses the idea herself.
You guys are to cute! Well, looking forward to getting more commentary from you! Good luck and feel free to reach out to me if you want to talk😊
Aww, thanks! I’m looking forward to talking more, and I will reach out if/when needed! 😉