Matt Walsh: If Bill Nye is a “scientist,” so am I

You may have noticed that Bill Nye, who is not a scientist, has been all over the media recently presented as an authority on nearly every field of science. Apparently, Bill Nye gets to be a "scientist" because he calls himself one. It is by this same scientific process that Bruce Jenner gets to be a woman and Rachel Dolezal a black person.

Speaking of which, Bill Nye spent an episode of his new show explaining very scientifically how gender is a spectrum and sometimes men can have women trapped inside of them. He then brought a sitcom star on stage to perform an ode to gender fluidity called "My Sex Junk." It was all quite scientific. Almost as scientific as the "March for Science," which Nye spearheaded this past weekend, where a bunch of people drove cars to DC in order to tell us that the planet is dying because we drive cars. Again, it's science. It's all science, OK? It must be science because Bill Nye says it, and he's a scientist, and we know he's a scientist because he says so.

Inspired by Bill Nye, I would like to now officially declare that I, too, am a scientist. I provide a more detailed overview of my scientific resume in the piece below, but suffice it to say that I am now one of the greatest scientific minds in human history. This is the case because I say it is the case. Also because I say the word "science" a lot. When someone asks me to prove my arguments, I simply shout, "science," which is what scientists do. It's part of the scientific method. You'd know that if you were a scientist like me. And Bill Nye, who is a dear colleague and mentor:

http://www.theblaze.com/contributions/matt-walsh-if-bill-nye-is-a-scientist-so-am-i/