Donald Trump and The Penis Poem.

It’s all very well people saying how remarkable I am for 92, but they don’t realise how a minor event at 52, becomes a mountain of effort 40 years later. It’s even harder If you haven’t a partner to share an experience, good or bad, even if it’s only to say ‘shut up woman. I know what I’m doing!’ in a nice familiar way, as befits a togetherness of many years of course.

Take last weekend for example – Saturday evening I felt a cold coming on so went to bed with a honey and lemon drink and a hot water bottle. Snuggling down all cosy and warm when I felt a strange sensation around my feet. Soon realised the hot water bottle had burst soaking the bed clothes.

I hadn’t a spare bed made up, so set about doing so in the middle of the night. Half way through finding duvets, the bedroom light went out. I’m too unsteady to stand on a step ladder or chair to fit a new bulb so I finished making the bed with a torch.

Bottom line, I was a bit fed up with that, and totally disenchanted with Brexit.

Can you imagine if Donald Trump had negotiated Britain’s divorce from the EU? Whatever position you take on Trump, and many see him as a blundering buffoon and a dodgy businessman, the evidence so far is that his style of politicking has been incredibly effective.

Many, including me, thought he had taken leave of his senses by beating his chest and engaging in yah boo, my weapon is bigger than yours, playground stuff with Kim Jong Un in the Korean crisis. Was it brave or foolhardy? He is a blunt, straight talking, no nonsense business man, and in that world such tactics have stood him in good stead and delivered outstanding success.

But in international politics, and especially against a North Korean leader who up to that point gave the impression of being someone spoiling for a war, to use the weaponry he was so proud of and frequently paraded to impress and frighten the world.

I was uneasy.

Even though America held the overwhelmingly stronger cards in weaponry and everything else, the unknown factor was the stability of the North Korean leader. Was life as precious to him?

Turned out it was - he blinked.

How many apart from President Trump, could have seen the way it turned out with the thawing of relations between North and South Korea and meetings between the respective leaders of the three countries.

It made me think, what if we had President Trump to negotiate Brexit? I can't imagine it lasting the two and a half years that it has, with the further prospect of another two. It looks like the worst of all results, neither properly in or out.

But see past Trump’s style of brinkmanship and you notice his blunt business tactics have worked incredibly well on the political stage, far better than the ‘mustn’t upset anyone’ approach of the politicians.

Boris Johnson is one who can see it. He says “I am increasingly admiring of Donald Trump. I have become more and more convinced that there is method in his madness,”

“Imagine Trump doing Brexit,” Johnson continued. “He’d go in bloody hard… There’d be all sorts of breakdowns, all sorts of chaos. Everyone would think he’d gone mad. But you might get somewhere. It’s a very, very good thought.”

President Trump advised U.K. Prime Minister May to start negotiations by suing the EU. I don’t know if he said on what grounds. Natural Justice indicates to me that it would be about trade restrictions. ‘As a member you cannot independently enter a trade agreement with a country outside the union bloc without the agreement of the other 27 members’

But what is the truth? When Prime Minister May recently visited Nigeria and other African countries in a charm offensive to prepare the ground for a post Brexit new trade deal, she found that Germany and France had beaten her to it a week earlier – so they were negotiating their own independent trade deals even though they are the strongest believers in, and founding members of, the European Union.

Seems to be an example of - ‘Don’t do as we do, do as we say’

And now for something completely different -